Rabbi Dovid Orlofsky spoke in Kew Gardens Hills on Tuesday on “Uniting the Jewish People – Answering Difficult Questions”. It was an informative and entertaining shiur and through the wonders of TorahAnyTime.Com you can view it here.
As Baalei Teshuva we’ve all had our share of questions and issues that have bothered us and our friends, family and acquaintances.
What are the questions and issues that have bothered you or your acquaintances?
Do you think you have good answers to all your questions and issues?
Update: These are some of the questions and issues that seem to bother other people. Do you have any to add?
-Does the Chosen People imply that Jews are better than other people?
-Why do women seem to be treated as second class citizens in Torah Judaism?
-Why does Torah Judaism fault gays for their natural tendencies?
-Why do the innocent suffer and the wicked prosper?
-Why did G-d cause the Holocaust?
-Why is there evil in the world?
-Why is there so much suffering in the world?
-Aren’t animal sacrifices cruel?
-Why does Torah contradict scientific evidence of the Age of the Universe?
-Why does Torah contradict the widely accepted theory of evolution?
-Why is there no generally accepted scientific, historical or archaeological evidence of the flood?
-Why is there no generally accepted scientific, historical or archaeological evidence of the Exodus?
-Can you prove there is a G-d?
-How do you know Torah was really given by G-d at Sinai?
-If there are multiple accepted interpretations of Torah in the Talmud why are the interpretations of the Reform, Conservative and Reconstructionist excluded?
-Why do so many Torah Observant Jews look unhappy?
-Why do I have to give up so many pleasures to become Torah observant?
-Why do Torah observant Jews look down on non-observant Jews?
-If I can’t keep the whole Torah, isn’t keeping part of it hypocritical?
-If I don’t plan on becoming Torah observant, why should I study Torah?
Updated from the comments (with slight modifications)
-Why do some Orthodox Jews seem to make a big deal about keeping kosher and wearing a uniform, but are rude to people, cheat on their taxes, and do other forms of bad behavior?
-All these rules mean you don’t get to see your family on the holidays. Isn’t religion really about family and morality, rather than ritual?
-Isn’t religion supposed to unite us, rather than divide us?
-Why would G-d care if I drive on Saturday especially if I am coming to Shul? (this question fits almost anything, it just starts why would G-d care if I……………)
-We have good refrigeration and cooking facilities now so why not eat pork?
-Can’t I just be a “good person?â€
-Isn’t it more important to honor your parents, so how can you not eat at their house anymore?
-Why do you have to be so Jewish?
-Why do we hear only success stories (like at Discovery or Aish or just about all the Kiruv sites) and not stories of those who were never reached, who stayed uninterested in Judaism despite all efforts?
-Isn’t it possible that the Pintele Yid will never manage to burst into flame?
-Why don’t I hear about other couples who remain at different levels and have to live with that difference forever?
-With so much focus on the success stories are we not neglecting the reality that a large percentage of Torah Observant Jews will have some awareness and relationship with Hashem, but it will nothing to write home about?
Well, I’ll bite.
As to your first question, there are some, i.e. in the Satmar / Neturei Karta camp, who are thoroughly anti-Zionist and don’t in any way compromise on this issue — they don’t take a penny in any form, though they cannot deny that they benefit from security arrangements and sacrifices made by the State of Israel and its citizens.
Most others who are, indeed, “leaders” have actually never been on the payroll of any Zionist or even State of Israel organization and have sacrificed personally in this way. I agree with you, though — I don’t see how you can be a government official and take this tack. I understand, however, that great people in the position to make these decisions have deemed this acceptable.
Others are against the philosophy of Zionism in its various manifestations but believe they have as much right to live in Israel as any Jew, Zionist or otherwise, and to participate in civil government, and tolerate the nominally Zionist government there as somewhat worse or somewhat better or roughly the same as any other government that is antithetical to Torah values, though there are probably no ruling elites in the world today in countries where there are significant Jewish populations that are as anti-Torah as that of the State of Israel.
But Jews being against Zionism is not the cause of “rockets, bombs, and attacks,” unless you are suggesting there is some kind of Divine punishment for lack of political alignment at work here. Why would you excuse the actual perpetrators of murder in this way?
Nor is the matter of whether a thin sliver of orthodox Jews question the “legitimacy” of Zionism or even the State of Israel of the slightest concern to the Jew-haters in the United Nations and in the anti-Israel halls of power around the world.
On the other hand, as many non-Zionist Jews will tell you, the contrary is almost certainly the case: The widespread hatred of Jews and Israel that is now politically and culturally acceptable in most countries, and in certain segments (such as academia) of all countries, is without a doubt directly related to the adventures, justifiable or otherwise, of Zionism and the state it created.
On the other other hand, where were the Jews supposed to go after the War? Back to Europe? To a Palestine controlled by vicious enemies? I don’t know.
But how ironic indeed that we, indeed, not only didn’t get out of the ’30’s, but perhaps live in a world that is even more antisemitic now than the one that existed then. Why? Again, I don’t know, but your question, I think, presumes a level of certitude about a very complex issue and, if I can say it, judgment about those who don’t see it as being as clear cut as you suggest, that is probably not supportable on closer consideration.
Why do the leaders of “charedim” in Israel call themselves “Antizionist” yet they are on the zionist payroll at the same time? (ie, political parties, rabbinate positions, etc).
This bothers me to no end.
A follow-up question would be why is the question of “zionist vs. antizionist” even still relevant for any Jewish leader today? The war was won, (many wars were won), 41% of the world’s Jews now live there, and even if they were only concerned about their own demographic (I hope the leadership are not so selfish and I really don’t believe that they are), still the charedim make up 15% of the Jewish population in that ‘state’ !!! What’s bad for what is today considered “zionism” is bad for the Jews living in Israel, and there is no escaping this. Antizionism from a nonreligious/non-Jewish perspective today equates to delegitimization of Israel, support to the terrorist-Arab cause, and more Jews being killed by rockets, bombs, and attacks. Are we a nation in addition to a religion like my rabbi has said, or are we just going to resign ourselves to a protestantized “closet-Judaism” which is solely a “theology” with no connection to national identity or the land of our forefathers or everyday practicality?
How can one love the Jewish people while calling himself “antizionist” as a “theological” foundation in today’s reality? Are we going to live in the 1930’s forever?
Ron,
Why would I want to learn and argue complicated torah opinions and stances from anyone other than a scholar. if I’m making a concerted effort to understand the more complicated angles of religion and texts I want to be able to really respect the individual I’m arguing with and listening to.
Walk the walk,
I actually have been running the run for a while now. Firstly I said “from” not “with” torah scholars. As in being part of the group the scholar is teaching. Do scholars only teach students that are in sync with their personal spiritually intellectual levels ?
I am not a stay at home mom , or housewife for that matter so why would I stay at home listening to MP3s when I could attend in person ? Obligation is not why I would be learning.
Chanaleah
Thanks for the info. I am well aware of the options available in passaic. Anything I want to learn is for men only in passaic last time I checked.
Anything I don’t want to learn is for women.
I love law and arguing legal concepts. I have not found any in depth non emotional non kabbalah non chabad non boring non story telling hardcore Indepth neuroscience versus
Mussar , halacha , gemara learning options taught by serious torah scholars with no hidden agendas and or attention seeking confetti tossing fan club fanfare oriented notions.
Classes that are open to women too and done in the evenings.
Not that there is anything reasonable about what I’m looking for. It is what it is.
Ànd I guess there is no sense in knocking what is out there until I find what I’m looking for.
Jaded Topaz: You probably already know, but there are a lot of evening learning opportunities for women in Passaic, and a substantial group of single women learners. I guess this is true for Manhattan also. Check Luach.
JT, may I butt in here for a second? Do you want to “learn” with a Torah scholar or be taught by a Torah scholar?
Most Torah scholars don’t want to learn with someone (man or woman) beneath their level of learning as it is not as “spunky” as when two people of relatively similar knowledge “go at it”.
If you want to be taught BY a Torah scholar, there are myriad tapes/CDs/mp3s that you can pop in and learn all night long. True, there is no capability to ask questions at that time, but you can take those questions from shiurim to your local Orthodox rabbi (who could be a scholar too). That’s how I get around the issues of being a mom staying at home while her husband learns in the evening. If you ask why I let him learn and I stay home, it is because he has an Torah obligation, whereas I do not. I still get to learn and enjoy listening to these Torah greats.
Why?
1 how could a non answer be the correct answer ?
2 does the sage deducing have any reasons attached the original question was why do married woman cover their hair. Sage deducing is hard to use as a reason without some concrete reasons.
3 I still don’t. understand the correct definition for tiflis.
4 how does the fact that you qualified , fix the concept that exists of having to qualify to learn torah in specific enviroments. Which if you think about it Is ludicrous if one is learning to get closer to Gd.this concept could be applied to any kind of organized learning for tuition enviroment.
In a plethora of settings and requirements.
5 you skipped five.
I’m looking for torah scholars to learn from in the evening. Not a torah chavrusah or a torah story teller , A torah scholar.
11 “yes” cannot equal “I don’t know” but ill forget about that for now though I reject your “not reasonably calculated to lead to the discovery of admissable evidence ” notion as questionable and bordering on a circuitous response with the intent to overide dismiss and resolutely rebuff. “unduly burdensome” is well subjective at best and does not resonate with your previous assertion to “answer them” when some other commenter asked what will happen to the questions once they are asked.
Though I do understand your answer and truthfully I’ve lost all patience trying to find answers that make me happy or learning enviroments that make me happy. Sometimes you just have to move on.
1. Oh my, Jaded, it is one of the most correct answers (so to speak) there is. It is the answer that leaves all other answers possible, without being dismissive of the questioner. It is the answer that some of us, including myself, find the hardest to give, too.
2. Great question. It appears in this case to mean that is a mitzvah (a religious obligation) from the Torah (d’oraysah) that the Sages learn by inference from the instruction — I think you know this! — that the “suspected adultress” (sotah) should, as part of her prescribed ordeal, have her head-covering removed. The verse does not say “if she’s wearing one,” so the Sages deduce that a married woman is to wear one.
3. It requires us to rely, as we do regarding all halachic issues, on rabbinical authority for guidance in how to apply the talmudic dictum in which the word is found, specifically — I think you know this! — the one that describes one who teaches his daughter Torah as teaching her “tiflis.”
4. Who said Jaded has to “prequalify”? You asked a general question. If you failed Navi in high school you still got more Navi than I did in high school, and then some. And they not only let me study gemora, “they” made it clear that if I didn’t I’d be, uh, something tiflis-like. In any case I don’t think Navi is the precise problem here.
11. I object on the grounds that your inquiry is overly broad, unduly burdensome, and not reasonably calculated to lead to the discovery of admissible evidence. Without waiving the foregoing objections, deponent states that upon information and belief “yes” means “I don’t know.”
Ron,
Quite the non-surly Sur-reply for my rhetorical questions.
You get a J++ for jocularity
You get a D+ for dismissivity and
And F+
for eFFort.
1)”I don’t know” is not the correct answer.
2) what does the word “mitzvah” mean and what would the reason for this be.
3)how does an alleged disagreement between knowledgable experts define the word , connotations and relevance in 2008.
4) this makes no sense , why do I have to pre qualify if I want to learn torah. If someone fails navi consistently throughout jewish school due to lack of interest this does not disqualify the individual from doing gemarah.
5) so Brisk and YU would allow me to join their evening after work bais medrash learning program even though I’m a female.
I’m looking for torah scholars to learn from in the evening after work.
11) define yes and in what way and how often and where is the evidence and discovery filed.
I don’t know how you’ve done it twice now, Ron, but you’ve got me rolling with laughter!
Still, I must say that I understand you, Ex-Sceptic. If you’d like to taste some more penetrating perspectives (dare I say “answers”?), ask the editors for my email and, bli neder, and we can try to learn a little.
Jaded, once again you present the most appealing challenges!
Here’s my shot at your questions, since you “asked”:
1. I don’t know.
2. It is a mitzvah.
3. There is disagreement amongst very knowledgeable scholars.
4. Because transmitting Torah is a very precious thing, not merely the doling out of a commodity.
5. They are not.
6. Because of our manifold sins.
7. There is disagreement amongst very knowledgeable scholars.
8. Because of our manifold sins.
9. I don’t know.
10. Yes.
1)How are we supposed to understand Bruriah(R Meir’s wife), her life story/ending and what she stood for?
2)Why do married women cover their hair?
3)What is the exact definition /root source for “tiflisâ€.
4)Why do you have to qualify and or meet certain requirements for the chance to learn Torah in certain environments especially from real Torah scholars?
5)Why would anyone be snobby and or haughtier than thou about their Torah knowledge and willfully choose who they will teach and or allow to attend classes (specifically Bais Medrashes that don’t allow women and other concepts like having to qualify to be accepted into any kind of Jewish learning continuing education yeshiva or otherwise …..
6)Why is the Short-line Bus Company still on strike?
7)Why were so many people asking me for general direction assistance/train schedule/routes/& city sights to see questions today?
8)Why is the train always pulling out of the station just as I’m running down or up the steps?
9)Why did R Wolbe request that the Alei Shur books not be translated into English?
10)Why is the homeless population growing in leaps and bounds ?
11)Is there any cause and effect connection/relationship between neuroscience and mussar?
I’m not offended.
Ron – no offense but your one word to one sentence answers on major issues are pretty much what I meant when I asked the questions about Rabbi’s giving dismissive answers.
Great subject. Thought provoking no matter where you hold on any of the issues. Thank you, Ron, for sharing your insights. Thank you everyone else for sharing, too. I’m still thinking about my list of questions…
-Does the Chosen People imply that Jews are better than other people?
No. Abraham chose to accept Hashem.
-Why do women seem to be treated as second class citizens in Torah Judaism?
Second class by 58th century “widely accepted theories”. Different yes, “second class” no.
-Why does Torah Judaism fault gays for their natural tendencies?
The tendencies aren’t natural. Sexual pleasure is to encourage procreation.
-Why do the innocent suffer and the wicked prosper?
-Why did G-d cause the Holocaust?
-Why is there evil in the world?
-Why is there so much suffering in the world?
They’re all one question. Hashem gave man free will. It’s our problem.
-Aren’t animal sacrifices cruel?
No. Is eating cruel? What do you eat that was never alive?
-Why does Torah contradict scientific evidence of the Age of the Universe?
I don’t see a conflict.
-Why does Torah contradict the widely accepted theory of evolution?
“Widely accepted” doesn’t mean valid – in some places it’s “widely accepted” that the son of a roman soldier who fulfilled none of the requirements of moshiach is messiah – that doesn’t make it true.
-Why is there no generally accepted scientific, historical or archaeological evidence of the flood?
Wasn’t the point of the flood to wipe clean and start over?
-Why is there no generally accepted scientific, historical or archaeological evidence of the Exodus?
There isn’t?
-Can you prove there is a G-d?
I believe (and we’re here).
-How do you know Torah was really given by G-d at Sinai?
pass..
-If there are multiple accepted interpretations of Torah in the Talmud why are the interpretations of the Reform, Conservative and Reconstructionist excluded?
I don’t equate “Torah observant” and Orthodox – I’ll pass on this one.
-Why do so many Torah Observant Jews look unhappy?
They do? I don’t see it. “Eye of the beholder” maybe?
-Why do I have to give up so many pleasures to become Torah observant?
What pleasures? I can’t think of any.
-Why do Torah observant Jews look down on non-observant Jews?
“Torah observant” Jews don’t.
-If I can’t keep the whole Torah, isn’t keeping part of it hypocritical?
Can’t or won’t? Part is a start, whole is a goal.
-If I don’t plan on becoming Torah observant, why should I study Torah?
Maybe it will change your mind?
Updated from the comments (with slight modifications)
-Why do some Orthodox Jews seem to make a big deal about keeping kosher and wearing a uniform, but are rude to people, cheat on their taxes, and do other forms of bad behavior?
Again, Orthodox doesn’t mean “Torah observant”.
-All these rules mean you don’t get to see your family on the holidays. Isn’t religion really about family and morality, rather than ritual?
Haven’t run into that one.
-Isn’t religion supposed to unite us, rather than divide us?
Faith does unite us. Man’s interpretation divides us.
-Why would G-d care if I drive on Saturday especially if I am coming to Shul? (this question fits almost anything, it just starts why would G-d care if I……………)
Pass..
-We have good refrigeration and cooking facilities now so why not eat pork?
One has nothing to do with the other.
-Can’t I just be a “good person?â€
That’s a first step.
-Isn’t it more important to honor your parents, so how can you not eat at their house anymore?
So bring food etc. and serve them. There’s a good chance they’ll be honored.
-Why do you have to be so Jewish?
I don’t have to, I choose to..
—
Ok, I probably shouldn’t have replied. I’m 4th generation “american reform” of Sephardic ancestry without the tradition that I see as eastern european rather than Jewish.
I deleted a few questions that I didn’t have any answer for.
I passed on three questions – I’m not Orthodox.
Are we really that different?
Bob, this thread grew out of Rabbi Orlofsky’s recent lecture about questions. In that lecture, for those who haven’t yet seen it, Rabbi Orlofsky speaks about the ability to answer questions, the different types of questioners and how, usually, the questions we are afraid someone will ask us are the ones with which we are not personally comfortable.
The question list above didn’t break any new ground. If we, as BTs, are to be somehow involved in kiruv, we need to become comfortable answering these questions and I think Ron did a good job with a lot of them by providing answers that expose some of the questions as based upon false assumptions, giving straight yes or no answers when possible and being honest.
And to Mark Frankel:
Kol HaKavod for having this thread, and thank you so much!
And to everyone:
Shabbat Shalom!
To Ron Coleman:
First of all, thank you for acknowledging that it’s possible that a Pintele Yid will never burst into flame.
I do read Beyond BT and I’ve heard about at least two other couples who are at differing levels from their spouses. But…only two? With all the BTs in the world, I’d think there’d be a lot more. How is it possible for two people to grow at the exact same rate?
Sigh…another Shabbos of going to shul alone, without him…but at least Shabbos is something to really look forward to, to recharge my own individual Jewish batteries! (And at least I don’t feel SO alone behind the Mechitza with my female friends.)
Of course the ultimate question:
Why do Jews answer one question with another question?
Answer (with a yiddish accent) WHY NOT?
Mark, I respectfully disagree with you about the need for this particular thread. But I honor you, too, because you, like the commenters, meant well.
I think venting is a very small part of this thread. If we care about our fellow Jew, which I assume we do, we have to care about their questions and concerns. We might not always be able to provide satisfactory answers, but being dismissive is not Ahavas Yisroel.
From The Antidote for Baseless Hatred:
There are three laws of ahavat Yisrael.
The first is that you have to speak well of your fellow Jew—not just not speak ill of him. And what you say has to be true. This means you must choose to focus on what’s true and good in him. You don’t have to mention his name. But you have to have a reason to say what you’re saying. It may feel artificial at first. But when you speak well of someone, you subconsciously align yourself with him, so with time it will feel increasingly natural.
Obviously, you have to be intelligent about whom you speak well of and to whom. The following, for example, will not work: “How fortunate you are that your mother-in-law moved in with you! I’ve always found her to be a font of constructive advice and criticism…†You have to be smart enough to anticipate the reaction, and make sure your praise doesn’t do more harm than good.
The second law of ahavat Yisrael is that you have to be concerned with your fellow Jew’s physical needs. This doesn’t mean giving tzedakah (“charityâ€)—that’s a different mitzvah. It means that if you see she is hot, open the window. If you see an old lady struggling with her shopping bags, don’t say, “Boy, it’s a shame they don’t deliver after four.†Help her.
Being physically helpful reminds us that we all belong to one club: the club of the “mortalsâ€. When you notice another’s needs, you become aware that she is not so different from you. You both get hot. You both need help carrying heavy things.
In Israel, when tragedy strikes, calls are put out on the emergency network for all volunteers to come to the hospitals. Most volunteers are young, religiously affiliated women ages 18 to 25. They often have nothing practical in common with the victims, many of whom are not religious, older, or younger. But they find themselves becoming part of the people whom they help.
In one terror attack, a whole family was injured, but the children recovered before the parents. Fortunately, neighbors were happy to take them for a while. The problem is, the neighbors were Ashkenazim and the children, who were Sefardim, didn’t like their food. Picture an 11-year-old Moroccan boy bursting into tears when he sees the gefilte fish. The next day a young American volunteer came to me asking, “Do you know anyone who knows how to make couscous?†As different as those children were from her, she became bonded to them through caring for their physical needs.
Speaking well of your fellow Jews and being concerned with their physical well-being are relatively easy.
The third law of ahavat Yisrael is the hard one: You have to honor them. Here’s where the “truth†problem raises its head: How can I honor people I disagree with?
The answer is: You can honor them because they’re human. You can honor them because they’re real. You can honor them because of the good you see within them.
Somehow, the idea of creating yet another discussion thread to elicit venting has not clicked.
1) Why is there such blatant racism in Orthodoxy and it is even considered a good thing?
“Orthodoxy” includes all sorts of people, so just as there are bad things among other groups, there are bad things among orthodox Jews.
2) Why is there such a confusion between Minhag and Halacha, and why don’t OJ’s generally accept that many of teh Minhags are a recent addition and not from Sinia?
There is a lot of information to assimilate, and most people just want to do the right thing.
3) Why when I have asked most Rabbi’s (this is purely personal experience) any of the above questions (and many of the questions in the list generated) do I get dismissive answers or no answers?
Maybe it depends how you ask.
Also just a side question, what will be done with the questions now that we have them?
I will answer them.
-Why do some Orthodox Jews seem to make a big deal about keeping kosher and wearing a uniform, but are rude to people, cheat on their taxes, and do other forms of bad behavior?
They are human beings and sometimes don’t do the right thing, regardless of their religious affiliation.
-All these rules mean you don’t get to see your family on the holidays. Isn’t religion really about family and morality, rather than ritual?
No, not really, though it is surely not merely about “ritual” either.
-Isn’t religion supposed to unite us, rather than divide us?
Yes.
-Why would G-d care if I drive on Saturday especially if I am coming to Shul? (this question fits almost anything, it just starts why would G-d care if I……………)
Why would G-d not care?
-We have good refrigeration and cooking facilities now so why not eat pork?
The Torah says not to eat pork.
-Can’t I just be a “good person?â€
Yes, you “can.”
-Isn’t it more important to honor your parents, so how can you not eat at their house anymore?
No.
-Why do you have to be so Jewish?
Have you seen my picture?
-Why do we hear only success stories (like at Discovery or Aish or just about all the Kiruv sites) and not stories of those who were never reached, who stayed uninterested in Judaism despite all efforts?
We must be listening to the wrong channel.
-Isn’t it possible that the Pintele Yid will never manage to burst into flame?
Yes.
-Why don’t I hear about other couples who remain at different levels and have to live with that difference forever?
You don’t read Beyond BT.
-With so much focus on the success stories are we not neglecting the reality that a large percentage of Torah Observant Jews will have some awareness and relationship with Hashem, but it will nothing to write home about?
Yes.
-Does the Chosen People imply that Jews are better than other people?
No.
-Why do women seem to be treated as second class citizens in Torah Judaism?
Because they are treated differently, and in a quasi-egalitarian secular society such as ours, “different” always implies “inferior.”
-Why does Torah Judaism fault gays for their natural tendencies?
It does not. It condemns specific behavior regardless of the natural predilections of individuals. This applies not only to homosexuality but to other things we have urges to do.
-Why do the innocent suffer and the wicked prosper?
See “Theodicy”.
-Why did G-d cause the Holocaust?
Who said G-d caused the Holocaust?
-Why is there evil in the world?
G-d gave every person free choice between good and evil.
-Why is there so much suffering in the world?
See “Theodicy”.
-Aren’t animal sacrifices cruel?
No.
-Why does Torah contradict scientific evidence of the Age of the Universe?
The Torah is not a scientific work.
-Why does Torah contradict the widely accepted theory of evolution?
The Torah is not a scientific work.
-Why is there no generally accepted scientific, historical or archaeological evidence of the flood?
The Torah is not a scientific work.
-Why is there no generally accepted scientific, historical or archaeological evidence of the Exodus?
The Torah is not a scientific, historical or archeaological work.
-Can you prove there is a G-d?
Not to the satisfaction of every person, no.
-How do you know Torah was really given by G-d at Sinai?
There are many good arguments that tend to make this seem more likely than is popularly assumed, but you cannot actually know this in the commonly accepted meaning of the word “know.” It is an element of our religious faith.
-If there are multiple accepted interpretations of Torah in the Talmud why are the interpretations of the Reform, Conservative and Reconstructionist excluded?
This is a comparison of apples to oranges; the premise of the question is faulty.
-Why do so many Torah Observant Jews look unhappy?
They do not.
-Why do I have to give up so many pleasures to become Torah observant?
The Torah forbids certain kinds of pleasure.
-Why do Torah observant Jews look down on non-observant Jews?
Who says they do?
-If I can’t keep the whole Torah, isn’t keeping part of it hypocritical?
No.
-If I don’t plan on becoming Torah observant, why should I study Torah?
It depends.
Three more questions that I have always wanted answers to:
1) Why is there such blatant racism in Orthodoxy and it is even considered a good thing?
2) Why is there such a confusion between Minhag and Halacha, and why don’t OJ’s generally accept that many of teh Minhags are a recent addition and not from Sinia?
3) Why when I have asked most Rabbi’s (this is purely personal experience) any of the above questions (and many of the questions in the list generated) do I get dismissive answers or no answers?
Also just a side question, what will be done with the questions now that we have them?
For Rabbi Slifkin fans:
When he states the world is most definitely not 6000 years old, and should be understood as moral/metaphoric lesson… how do you understand this messagge? Moreover, when he clamis that anyone who understands this to be a literal account of creation, is misunderstood.
Question:
If they are misunderstood about this issue, what about other issues?
My answer (warning, this will not work for most):
It’s all midrash/metaphor (Heschel). And hence my practice benefits me, possibly others and no one else. If I use electricity on Shabbos (I do), it may be taking me away from a Shabbos experience ANOTHER rabbi understood it to be.
Post-Aish, I tried Judaism from a halachic perspective. It all seemed too-OCD’ish for me.
When we ask: Why do yids leave Judaism for ashrams? One answer is that very few Jews will find the minutiae of halachic Judaism rewarding. Some may find God in these details, I didn’t.
In closing, the last “question” for me was the common complaints I heard from FFBs about the very same things I found annoying i.e. long Shabbos summers, minutiae of halacha, etc. When asked why they did it, they’d respond: “I have to, but it’s a pain in the arse”.
Many questions, very few satisfying answers. For those that make/are making the leap, and find a frum lifestyle spiritually rewarding, I truly applaud your efforts, and in a sense, envy you.
Agutten Shabbos
Quite a few years ago when my son was “at risk” and definitely bored and not into learning, I asked the principal if the boys could be offered more options to excel in, like the girls’ schools had, e.g. doing chesed. The principal’s response was: “But if the yeshiva offers that, then we’re afraid that the good boys will also want to do chesed.” Quote, unquote. So the question: Why is a boy only considered “good” if he learns?
Example: When a BT crosses the threshold into believing that Tshb”p is a direct expression of G-d’s Will. Beautiful. Crucial key to becoming a ehrliche Yid. But then you start learning and learning that Gemora… and find yourself and or many of your fellow B.Midrash bench-warmers wallowing in very non-godly energies. WHAT’s going on? How can we accept that? Somehow this most precisous expression of H’s Will is not being engaged properly.
A newly married, quite tamim BT in my Kollel just confided in me today about how all the cold technicality of his Gemora prep and shiur and review are driving him further away from kirvas Elokim than ever before!
“Now THAT’s a good question!”, I told him…
Both.
When you turn your entire upbringing on its head in search for truth, all values are game. After a few serious years of learning, however, most of us are able to discern the purity of unadulterated Torah. That’s when the “community values” become the bigger issue.
But at its core, my question is about BT complacency. How dare we!
YY – Did you mean fundamental Torah values or Torah community values? Could you give an example to clarify?
EXCELLENT idea to spell out all these questions fearlessly. Kol HaKavod, Mark!
At the least, such candidness should shake up the skeptics among us. Torah observance is not about running away from questions. Certainly not for BT’s. In fact, I’ve often felt ambivalence about this site for precisely this reason. Is it another smoke screen for the non-answers that many frum Jews live with,or is it an especially honest framework for probing these issues?
Ok – so perhaps that’s MY issue: How come so many BT’s neglect their G-d given calling to challenge fundamental Torah values?
Ron, You make a very interesting point.
– On one hand many people concerned about their fellow Jews stress there is no such thing as a bad question.
– On the other hand, I’ve often heard your response – that it’s not really a good question.
– We also have to factor in that the Rishonim, Achronim and modern day Rabbonim wrote answers to many of these questions without dismissing them as kvetches.
Somethings gotta give.
Ron, I hear what you are saying and pretty much agree. However, these are many of the questions that non-observant Jews are asking. So, at the very least, it’s important to think about how to (or even whether to) answer them.
Why do we hear only success stories (like at Discovery or Aish or just about all the Kiruv sites) and not stories of those who were never reached, who stayed uninterested in Judaism despite all efforts? I know I’m asking a loaded question but it is just so frustrating to expect my own personal situation to have a happy resolution and it just doesn’t – there is just one blank wall after another, one locked door after another. Why don’t we hear about the Pintele Yid that never does manage to burst into flame? Why don’t I hear about other couples who remain at different levels and have to live with that difference forever?
OK here we go:
1)Why would G-d care if I drive on Saturday especially if I am coming to Shul? (this question fits almost anything, it just starts why would G-d care if I……………)
2) We have good refrigeration and cooking facilities now so why not eat pork?
3)can’t I just be a “good person?”
4) Isn’t it more important to honor your parents, so how can you not eat at their house anymore?
5) Why do you have to be so Jewish?
The problem with many of the questions here that are about “why is the frum the world so bad about X,” including Larry’s, is that they are based on generalizations or factually incorrect premises.
“So many” orthodox Jews do this and that, and don’t do the other thing? There are no “metrics” for these generalizations and assumptions, yet they are frequently put forward by people who claim to be advocates of intellectual rigor or the “scientific method.”
That doesn’t mean we can’t all identify problems and wrestle with them. We do that here all the time. But frankly omnibus kvetchathons such as the one suggested by this post have the disadvantage of causing the reader to assume the overall worst given the aggregated negative assumptions overall.
Each one of these questions, or at least many of them, is deserving of individual attention — if only to demonstrate that it is, again, based on faulty premises, unsupported assumptions or anecdotal “proof.”
Why do so many Orthodox Jews seem to make a big deal about keeping kosher and wearing a uniform, but are rude to people, cheat on their taxes, and do other forms of bad behavior?
All these rules mean you don’t get to see your family on the holidays. Isn’t religion really about family and morality, rather than ritual?
Isn’t religion supposed to unite us, rather than divide us?