Many people have overcome a number of obstacles to take the steps necessary to learn more about Judaism.
Here are some obstacles:
1) Was afraid that I would have to give up too many pleasurable activities.
2) Judaism seemed old fashioned and unsophisticated.
3) Thought it would be hypocritical to do somethings without doing everything.
4) Felt uncomfortable and judged by Torah Observant people.
5) Was afraid of what my friends and relatives would say.
Which of these did you need to overcome?
What obstacles are missing from the list?
What are the challenges facing the people you know?
I am always asked “what do you find the hardest about living a Torah life 24/7” or “didn’t you have any obstacles and/or 2nd thoughts during your conversion”
Odd as it may seem – I did not encounter the obstacles listed above. My only obstacle was that of the rabbis trying to discourage me. Their attempts to discourage was for naught. ~smile~
The main obstacle was different kinds of “social.”
I was mostly terrified by my parents’ reaction. I also reckoned very consciously with the fact that I had invested all this time and energy in learning how to be a veritable Ralph Lifschitz, style-wise, and now I was just undoing it all. And I guess in a related vein getting past the reactions of my college friends was a source of anxiety.
I just met a childhood friend of mine who became frum. Now she Boruch Hashem has two boys in Yeshiva. She finds it so hard to do Hebrew homework with them.
For me, number three, Thought it would be hypocritical to do somethings without doing everything, was an issue for me. My sister told me how can I keep shabbos and still eat from the “treif” pots and pans and dishes. I felt very bad that at that point, being only 16, I didn’t have the guts to take that step. I confided in my friend and she told me to take things little by little and it is not an all or nothing. By the following year I had my own dishes and pots and pans.
I also can relate to number five, my family was very unsupportive of my efforts to be religious, they called me Rebbitzen and teased me and I was embarressed to say brochos on food in front of them so I would be very discreet about everything I did. It was like being a Marrano! Not pleasant at all for me.
There is so much available now in every possible format, to show the fascinating wisdom and depth of Torah, that concern #2 should not last long. If it does, one should seek out another teacher.
1) give up the first profession I learned (but I got a better one afterwards)
2)be rejected by my family
3) skip most family celebrations
4) not find a spouse
Certainly, all of the above. As much as I think a gradual approach is best for most people, the full yeshiva / seminary immersion approach makes #5 much easier to deal with. As far as #3 goes, I would phrase it as “How do I find the right balance?” And for that, a more gradual approach is much better, and less cognitive dissonance producing.