As the film Inspired Too highlights, there are many situations where Kiruv is possible and practical. If a person is friendly and approachable, co-workers, friends, relatives and even strangers might ask a variety of questions. Many of these are easy to answer and others can be researched. In some cases a book or website recommendation would be appropriate.
There are situations where a little training would be helpful. Here is a question for the Beyond BT readers, “What material would be helpful in a Kiruv Training Seminar?”
Here are some thoughts from frequent Beyond BT commentor Bob Miller (in no particular order):
1. Compare and contrast the western civilization outlook with the Jewish outlook.
2. What is the unique mission of the Jewish people? How have we accomplished that in practice? Where have we fallen short and why?
3. Compare and contrast the ways we learn about HaShem’s management of the world, such as observation and revelation, and detail the value of each.
4. Explain Judaism as a total life package.
5. Explain what tefilla is for and the modes of tefilla. What brings us to love HaShem and how do we express that? Explain and demonstrate the nuts and bolts of tefilla and negina. Explain how to get over mental obstacles to tefilla. Musical accompaniment is very good for this segment.
6. Tell true instructive stories of Tzaddikim and by Tzaddikim.
7. Use only instructors who know the material, but will not respond hastily to questions that need research, and who are exemplars of the virtues taught. This means that a crash course will not equip someone to instruct. Better to use someone with accomplishments.
8. Tell us how to view Jews who might need our help in a way that makes us respect them and not use them as objects or means to our ends.
What about passing out cards at the end w/ kiruv websites like: http://www.simpletoremember.com/ ?
Come on down!
I guess that depends how good your wife’s cooking really is.
“Don’t tell anyone but I’m a Yankee fan”
We make allowances for sincere misjudgments, but (pleasantly) encourage teshuva.
Don’t tell anyone but I’m a Yankee fan *ducks*
Mets fans are also highly valued in our house.
Steve- I would definitely agree that it would be appropriate for some beginners and many more seasoned BTs. I was just raising the point within the context of the thread title which was for a kiruv seminar.
Bob said:The delicious meals are from my wife who knows how to cook!
I’ll have to drop in the next time I find myself in Indianapolis (I know, the home of the Super Bowl Champion Colts).
The tuna cholent was by and for me working in New Hampshire. The delicious meals are from my wife who knows how to cook!
David-I would agree that the quantity and range of the average frum person’s library might be inappropriate for some, but certainly not for all first time visitors. Yet, as a potential BT progresses, would I be incorrect in wondering how the subject would not surface, especially if discussions evolve from the superficial to deeper ones such as why do we learn and place so much emphasis on learning, etc?
“This could undo all the kiruv impact of the delicious meals …” said the man who invented the tuna hocky puck cholent.
Steve Brizel (February 20th, 2007 11:34) discussed the meaning and kiruv utility of “the sheer quantity and range of sefarim in the average host’s house”.
If perceptive Shabbos guests saw all my seforim, they’d marvel at how little I’ve actually learned from them! This could undo all the kiruv impact of the delicious meals and the zemiros.
Anyway, Steve’s point is basically correct.
Steve, while I think that you make excellent points, I’m not so sure if every beginner is ready for tha heavy load. It may be interesting or inspiring for some but not for all.
Perhaps that brings up another thing to be discussed at a kiruv seminar; the individuality of each Jew. Just as no one “engaging in kiruv” should view the person they are engagin as a “notch in their belt” or a “ticket to heaven”, we should also be careful to not view each person interested in torah as similar to the next.
I could be way off base on this comment but I wonder whether a first time Shabbos visitor is awed, impressed or overwhelmed by the sheer quantity and range of sefarim in the average host’s house. Has anyone ever been asked why they seem to have such a huge library? If I were asked, I would offer the response that when we daven, we speak to HaShem, and that when we learn Torah, we try, no matter how challenging, to discern what HaShem said and says to us today. I would also note that whenever we learn and cite the view of a Tanna, Amora and Rishon, we use the present tense because we believe that the Tanaim, Amoraim, Rishonim, etc speak to us today thru their stated views on any issue. I would also add that Judaism speaks to the past, present and future of every Jew and that the sefarim, books and other media represent my feeble attempt to make that connection, however inadequate, when compared to Gdolim who have mastered Torah.
Ora, If you compare the totality of our comments above, you’ll see a lot of overlap. I think we’re both rightly skeptical of crash course seminars and quick fixes in general.
The one-day seminar idea only works if either:
1. The attendees come in basically prepared, only needing instruction in practical tactics (they would have to be aware enough to know where they’re holding—can we count on that?),
or 2. The seminar is not a stand-alone event but part of a process (see my comment of February 18th, 2007 23:07).
Bob Miller–When I think about a participant at a kiruv training seminar, I imagine someone who is already religious, and therefore hopefully knows how to fulfill mitzvot and has an answer to the whys as well. If they don’t know about tefila or hashgacha, they need at least a few months in yeshiva before they start thinking about doing kiruv. If they just haven’t thought about questions like “why do we pray” or “what’s our mission as Jews,” they shouldn’t be doing kiruv until they develop a healthy sense of intellectual curiousity.
I don’t disagree with you that the participants should be familiar with the subjects you mention. As you say, these are things that mature adults need to know. I just don’t agree that a kiruv seminar is the proper place to address such issues. People should first educate themselves, then worry about educating others.
Also, these issues are too important to be addressed in depth in a seminar. They require years of study and thought. If someone just picked up their understanding of Hashem’s management of the world in a seminar, they aren’t going to have anything terribly deep or meaningful to teach on the issue no matter how inspiring the seminar was.
Above February 19th, 2007 09:17 18,
I meant: Simple does not mean uninformed.
Ora,
The response of the host should be sincere and not formulaic, but it should be based on actual knowledge as much as possible. Simple does not mean uniformed.
The basics I’ve been talking about are not third grade stuff. They are what mature adults need to know, at a mature level.
Bob Miller (#14)–I feel that efforts to give a “communicable knowledge base” often lead to a phony, artificial feel. If, for example, a non-religious Jew is being hosted for a Shabbat meal in an observant home, it won’t necessarily help them to hear formulaic answers to questions like “why keep shabbat.” They should hear the sincere response of the host, however simple it may be.
Discussion between religious and non-religious should be heart-to-heart, and should not be prepared for as if it were a debate match. I’ve found that sometimes ‘kiruv professionals’ completely mis-answer questions because they are using formulas instead of listening to what’s really being asked.
If the wannabe kiruv artists lack basic knowledge to the point where they don’t know if or where in the Torah Hashem mentions things like Shabbat and Kashrut, then they should focus on themselves before worrying about educating others. But I don’t think that’s a very common problem.
As for “techniques,” I didn’t mean it in the sense of “battle tactics.” I mean nice, simple things like invite a fellow Jew to dinner, notice who around you needs a place for holidays and be sure to offer one, etc. There are a lot of people who just don’t realize what the communal needs are and need some help getting started.
On reflection, I can see some value to one-day seminars as an intro, and more intensive 1 to 2 week courses as follow-up opportunities for those non-professionals who need the added grounding in fundamentals. Some one-on-one discussion between each trainee and a trainer after a one-day event (not necessarily on the same day as the event) could allow them both to see if the trainee is ready to function yet.
I realize that various organizations offer a wealth of kiruv-oriented material on the Web and elsewhere. Each of these organizations has its own particular outlook within the Orthodox spectrum, so the person looking for material for use in the field has to first establish his/her own outlook, to be able to select the right material.
Creating course material that does justice to all forms of Orthodoxy is a real challenge! When this is not feasible, at least the organizers can accurately advertise where they’re coming from.
What I don’t want to see is well-intentioned people trying to send a message that they don’t grasp yet themselves, or is even at odds with their basis orientation in Orthodoxy.
Ora said,
“I disagree with numbers 3-6. Why get into teaching them basics like hashgacha and tefila? Presumably they know the basics already, and if they don’t, one seminar won’t be long enough to teach them.”
I am less confident than Ora that people going in will have the organized, comprehensive, communicable knowledge base that will have to underly their future kiruv efforts. I want attendees to become armed with enough knowledge and skills to improvise an approach fit any new or old situation, and not with just some toolkit.
Therefore, I’m very uncomfortable with the idea of a short seminar, even for those familiar with the topic headings to some degree. What I envision is more like an intensive 1 to 2 week short course, with different level options for at least some units depending on the trainee’s level coming in. And self-study has to follow the formal course! Practical exercises might be included, too.
Ora also said, “Kiruv success stories are important.”
This is good, but they absolutely have to be
true in all respects (except the names) and have to be examples of what is normally possible.
Reagrding Tzaddikim, I had mentioned both stories about them and stories by them. Stories by them illustrate important life lessons for anyone. Stories about them are to give a glimpse of the ideal. Every calling has an ideal. The idea is knowing what type of person to revere and to approach (directly and through books and recordings) for answers to difficult, serious questions.
The kiruv don’ts Ora listed are good examples. The main thing is to avoid stereotyping.
While I recognize the need for techniques, I’m personally allergic to having obvious techniques tried on me. But that’s only me, I guess.
Here in B’more we ran a “Kiruv Training Seminar” last May. Judging from the attendance (full house) there is a big demand for such seminars.
This was an all-day event and so we were able to cover a lot of ground. The units fell under 2 categories:
a. chizuk – why this is important
b. haskafa – what “kiruv” means (in a nutshell: making a relationship, not making someone frum)
c. eitza – various practical tools that anyone can use depending on background (at the office, at the Shabbat table, with family members, etc)
From participant feedback, all 3 areas were important. One popular segment was panels of laypersons whose message was, “if I can do this, so can you”
The entire seminar was digitally recorded, included some of Baltimore’s gedolim.
You can hear the Rosh Yeshiva Rav Aharon Feldman’s keynote, Where We are in Jewish History, here: http://tinyurl.com/2x7wdz
You can here R. Shlomo Porter’s practical 30-min primer here: http://tinyurl.com/28cysl
We are now looking for ways to distribute the above audio (and the rest of the seminar) to those who do not have internet access.
Feedback welcome.
AS
I disagree with numbers 3-6. Why get into teaching them basics like hashgacha and tefila? Presumably they know the basics already, and if they don’t, one seminar won’t be long enough to teach them.
If I were teaching a group interested in doing kiruv (not on a professional basis, that would take more than one seminar to teach), I would focus on four things:
1) Why do kiruv
2) Ideas for how to do kiruv
3) A few don’ts
4) Kiruv success stories
1) is kinda like Bob’s 1 and 2. I think that a lot of frum people, especially FFBs, don’t necessarily understand the immediate downsides of living a secular life. They sometimes see it in terms of, secular people aren’t doing Hashem’s will, and that’s not good for the Jewish people. Which is true, but the focus should be more (IMO) on how keeping Torah will help every Jews to live the best life they can. That will help the potential kiruv-ers see that what they’re doing is completely, 100% in the best interests of the kiruv-ees. The kiruv-ees will sense this.
2) Lots of people want to help their fellow Jews but have no idea how to start. I would present some suggestions, ranging from easy (ex. mishlach manot to collegues) to more difficult (ex. hosting 30 locals for your Pesach seder). The examples would be pulled from experience, mine or others’.
3) Basic don’ts. Even those who were once not so religious don’t always remember some of the basic things that can turn others off from religion. Examples are: don’t assume your guests don’t know anything, don’t assume they do know, always have shalom bayit in your own home, don’t push one particular hashkafa as the only way, don’t claim something is halacha if it’s chumra. Etc.
4) Kiruv success stories are important. I don’t think that stories from tzadikim are very helpful, since most people don’t really see themselves as the types who will someday be tzadikim. Instead, I would focus on how people’s simple steps towards helping a fellow Jew made a real difference.
Also, it’s important to remind the audience that the effects of their efforts probably won’t be immediately visible. I’ve seen people get disappointed after they, for example, hosted a university student for shabbat, and the student was still acting in a very not-religious kind of way. I would stress that every step towards observance counts, and even a single event that doesn’t lead to an immediate outwards change is important. Sometimes all a person comes away with is “well, I guess religious people aren’t all so bad.” This is very, very important, even if they then continue in their same lifestyle. True stories would be good for this last section, with an emphasis on people who became religious slowly, even years after their initial contact with Torah.
More helpful would be a postive monitored discussion board for people who have relatives who have become Torah observant.
EDH,
Kiruv attempts can go wrong in zillions of ways, and many relate to the personalities involved. What flops for me might work for you (as either an info giver or receiver).
I’m leery of overconcentration on kiruv techniques. I’d prefer to get the relevant facts straight, plus genuine empathy from the formal or informal kiruv worker.
An earnest person aiming to motivate in quasi-mechanical fashion, following his/her Official Kiruv Playbook point by point, can look pretty funny or maybe sad. Maybe a skit about this would help break the ice at a seminar, but I don’t know how much of a practical problem this has been.
I like Bob’s list, but maybe there could be a 9 like “show bad things that can happen with kiruv gone wrong and why” (in a movie UnInspired? or Kiruv Expired? .. never mind). I think we can learn a lot from the failures too, so that at least those known are not repeated.
Just a thought.
The reason that there can’t be a standard answer is that it depends on what stage the person is at. If someone is already coming to a kiruv event (Gateways, Aish, et al), then you can fully apply Bob’s very well thought out list. But if you’re no where even near there, then just bring a big heart, patience, kindness, middos, and don’t be judgmental about where that person is holding, because he/she may once have been you.
Just too a second to attempt to catch up on reading. Great ideas, Bob. Number 5 (as a product of a kiruv organization and as a former ‘professional’ is often overlooked.
Point nuber 8 is also something that is at times sacrificed in order to put the proverbial ‘notch’ in the kiruv belt.
“Having kiruv seminars gives the impression that all you need is a quick crash course and you’re ready to go. Nothing could be farther from the truth when it comes to kiruv.”
I think there’s professional kiruv and then there’s the grassroots, met a co-worker type of kiruv. It is the latter that can benefit from a crash course.
One of the things I would love to see in a kiruv seminar is an emphasis on the fact that being mekarev someone shouldn’t be thought of as a “notch in your belt” or “a ticket to heaven”.
Where are my critics when I really need them?
Mark, Bob,
I think the problem is it is TOO good! Clear, to the point, little to debate!
Great material as topic headers for a more expanded work.
I thought that Bob’s list was excellent-it included intellectual honesty ( #7), the critical importance and significance of unifying past, present and future ( 1,2,4,8) and explaining how we relate to Hashem via Tefila and Torah (5,6).
I like this one the most:
7. Use only instructors who know the material, but will not respond hastily to questions that need research, and who are exemplars of the virtues taught. This means that a crash course will not equip someone to instruct. Better to use someone with accomplishments.
Having kiruv seminars gives the impression that all you need is a quick crash course and you’re ready to go. Nothing could be farther from the truth when it comes to kiruv.
Of course kiruv “professionals” need to understand current events and contemporary issues with an eye towards history, classic proofs (ie kuzari), reason behind mitzvos, etc. But when push comes to shove, kiruv is best done by people who’s life represents what they teach. That means advanced learning of Torah, enjoying being frum, caring about people and their needs, good home cooked food is an asset, humility, a mesora from others about what the Torah’s views are in many areas of life that aren’t always possible to quantify for a seminar.
That said, assuming there are people who are kiruv type people in the raw, it would good to train them in communications skills. Many fine kiruv-inclined people with natural talent could benefit from that.
Curious as to the lack of comments.
1) Are people not interested in Kiruv?
2) Do people feel they have enough information?
3) Do people feel that Bob covered everything?
I was basically thinking of the type of seminar that would appeal to me as an attendee.
Other nuts and bolts of kiruv, including inviting people as Shabbos guests, are important, too.
Shtick-free kiruv has a bright future.