A recent Torah-oriented email newsletter discussed the fact that BTs are often exposed to a beautiful life of harmonious family life, Tzinius dress and festive Shabbos meals but are not informed of the food, clothing, tuition and other costs involved.
What are the things you wish you were told?
And would knowing those things have affected the path you took?
New York – In a fiery speech, a respected Brooklyn Rabbi called for an all out war against yeshivos that throw talmidim out of their institutions.
Rabbi Aaron Krausz, a prominent chareidi Rov from Williamsburg, New York, and Rosh Yeshiva of Yeshiva Shaar Hatalmid in Brooklyn, addressed the baalei batim during Shalosh Seudos in his Shul on Shabbos Parshas Lech Licha.
In an explosive speech, which was delivered in Yiddish after the z’man and was recorded, R’ Kraus screamed “Rabosai, there is a fire burning in the Jewish community! All those yeshivos who only take metzuyanim have blood on their hands! We have teens wandering the streets, thrown out because they don’t know a p’shat or a deep Rashba? Stop with the nonsense!†“oh, you wanna build “lomdimâ€. That’s your goal, right? Look around in shul. Show me all those lomdim you brought up with this system. Show me!!â€
Rabbi Krausz continued his stern admonition, urging a financial boycott of all institutions that expel talmidim from their hallowed halls saying, “when they come for you for Tezdokah to support their yeshiva, make it clear to them. Tell them: “I will only support you if you accept everyone, if you care about ALL Talmidim.â€
Read the whole article here.
One of the reasons we started Beyond BT is because we felt that BTs needed more support and that we can provide some through this forum.
It has been a limited success given the limitations of an online community/forum and the limited available resources, but perhaps we can use today’s question to brainstorm how we can provide more support for BTs.
Here some common issues below and their obstacles.
Please suggest how perhaps we can overcome any of the mentioned obstacles.
Providing Classes of All Types for BTs.
Obstacles: Attendance is usually sparse.
Getting Mentors for BTs.
Obstacles: Good willing mentors are hard to find. There is no mechanism for BTs to request mentors. BTs are hesitant to request mentors.
Getting Rebbeim for BTs
Obstacles: Good BT-oriented Rebbeim are hard to find. Rebbeim are usually paid for their time through their shuls and there is no other normative structure to pay good Rebbeim for their time.
Providing Live Support Meetings for BTs
Obstacles: It does not seem that BTs want to get together to discuss their issues.
A friend asked us to post the following:
She and her husband are making their first wedding for their son and they have no family support on their side.
The boy is marrying an FFB girl.
From a BT point of view, how have others handled the gashmius factor in frum weddings?
How have people cut costs?
What was “indispensible” (besides the obvious halachic requirements) and what wasn’t?
Are their any issues specific to BT/FFB chasuna?
Were there any surprises that arose due to not having been brought up attending frum chasunas?
Thanks in advance for your help.
The Yomim Tovim are past and it’s a good opportunity to increase our Torah learning. How many times are we rushing to finish the Parsha on Friday night or Shabbos morning?
Why not start early in the week so you can research some of the questions you have and do a better job of learning the Parsha.
Here’s Rabbi Rietti’s outline of Noach. You can purchase the entire outline of the Chumash here.
Noach
#6 Building Noach’s Ark
#7 The Flood
#8 Mt. Ararat
#9 Rainbow – Noach Drunk
#10 The Descendants of Shem, Cham & Yafet
#11 Tower of Bavel – 10 Generations of Noach
#6 Building Noach’s Ark
* Praise of Noach
* The Three Sons of Noach
* World corruption
* “Behold! I will destroy them utterly!”
* Build an ark
* Compartments
* 300 X 50 X 30 cubits
* Skylight – Slanted Roof – 3 Stories
* 1 Male – 1 Female of every animal – Store Food
#7 The Flood
* 7 pairs of kosher animals
* 2 pairs of non-kosher animals
* 7 pairs of birds
* Noach 600 years old when flood began (2nd month, 17th day)
* 40 days & 40 nights – 15 cubits above the highest mountain
* Total destruction
* 150 days
#8 Mt. Ararat
* 150 days till water receded
* 7th Month, 17th day, the Ark rested on Mt. Ararat
* 10th Month, 1st day mountain tops become visible
* Raven
* Dove #1, #2, #3
* 1st Tishrei Noach opened gate of Ark
* 2nd Month, 27th day, land was totally dry (exactly 365 days after the flood began).
* ‘Leave the Ark!’
* Noach built an Altar
* G-d appeased & promises never to flood the earth again
* Four seasons
#9 Rainbow – Noach Drunk
* Blessing to Noach “Be fruitful and Multiply!”
* All living creatures will fear you
* You can eat meat but not flesh from living animal
* Violation of suicide
* Death penalty for murder
* Command to be fruitful and multiply
* G-d promises never to flood entire world again
* Rainbow is sign of this promise
* Noach planted a vineyard
* Drunk
* Canaan cursed: slave of slaves to his brothers
* Blessed Shem and Yafet
* Noach died 950
#10 The Descendants of Noach
* Descendants of Yafet and Cham (Nimrod grandson of Cham & 1st world despot)
* Descendents of Canaan
* Descendants of Shem
#11 Tower of Bavel – 10 Generations of Shem
* One Language
* The Tower
* HaShem scattered them
* 10 Generations of Shem
* 11th Gen. Shem 600
* 12th Gen. Arpachshad 438
* 13th Gen. Shelach 433
* 14th Gen. Ever 464
* 15th Gen. Peleg 239
* 16th Gen. Re’oo 239
* 17th Gen. Serug 230
* 18th Gen. Nachor 248
* 19th Gen. Terach 205 – Avram-Nachor-Haran
* Haran – Lot – Milka & Yiska (Sarai). Haran dies in Ur Kasdim
* Avram marries Sarai
* Nachor marries Milka
* 20th Gen. Avram
* Terach leaves Ur Kasdim with Avram, grandson Lot & Sarai
* Terach dies in Charan
Have a wonderful joyful Succos.
____________________________________________
From Derech Emes
Directions of Lulav Waivings
____________________________________________
Rashi: left, right, front, back, up, down
Tur: front, left, right, back, up, down
Beth Yosef and Rema: front, right, back, left, up, down
Levush: front, right, left, up, down, back
Ari: right, left, front, up, down, back
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Twenty four hours before Yom Kippur, two tornados hit Queens, Brooklyn and Staten Island tearing down and uprooting over 2,000 trees.
What lessons did you learn or hear from you Rav after this awesome display of Hashem’s might right before the day of judgment?
I think this is one of the most important articles to read in preparation for Rosh Hashana: Why Judgement – By Rabbi Noson Weisz
An excerpt:
INVESTMENTS VERSUS REWARDS
The very first point that must be emphasized is that contrary to popular belief, Rosh Hashana is not about reward and punishment. The Talmud informs us that mitzvot cannot be rewarded in this world (Kiddushin 39b). The commentators explain that the physical world simply does not have the resources to deliver the amount of joy required to compensate the performance of even a single Mitzvah.
Only people who do not have the merit to make it to the World to Come are written into the Book of Life to compensate them for their past good deeds; we certainly hope that none of us are in this position, The conclusion: when we stand before God and pray for a good life in the coming year, we are not asking Him to provide it fo rus as a reward.
But if the judgment we face on Rosh Hashana does not concern reward, what exactly is being weighed? According to Rabbi Dessler, the model we should study as an aid to understanding the deliberations of the Heavenly Court on Rosh Hashana is an economic investment model; the judgments of Rosh Hashana are the heavenly equivalents of earthly investment policy decisions. On Rosh Hashana it is decided how much Divine energy God will invest in the world in general and in our own lives in particular in the course of the coming year.
Please read the whole thing.
Rabbi Welcher on Tekios on Rosh Hoshana 2010 – mp3 can be download here.
Rabbi Oelbaum on Teshuva 2010 – mp3 can be download here.
Rabbi Yonason Sacks on Teshuva – mp3 can be download here.
Rabbi Welcher on Selichos night from 2007 can be downloaded here.
Rabbi Welcher on Halachos of Blowing Shofar from 2007 can be downloaded here.
R’ Dovid Schwartz on Rabbi Yonah of Gerona – Guilt is Good can be download here.
R’ Moshe Schwerd on Rosh Hoshana – Why Change is Possible can be downloaded here.
R’ Moshe Schwerd on Din V’Cheshbon can be downloaded- here.
R’ Daniel Stein on Hilchos Teshuva – Chapter 2 can be downloaded here.
R’ Yechezkel Rosenberg on How Loud Can You Daven on Yomim Noraim and Other Times can be downloaded here.
R’ Yakov Haber on Rosh Hoshana davening can be downloaded here.
R’ Yakov Haber on Rosh Hoshana and Hirhur Teshuva according to Rav Soloveitchik can be downloaded here.
A fellow BT has been blessed by Hashem with great insight and great financial resources. Looking back at what was missing when he became frum, he has allocated significant funds to provide learning opportunities specifically for BT’s — at this point specifically for BT women who he feels are really under-served!
Yes, finally, someone understands that many of us – especially the newcomers – need something other than more outreach classes to help us really feel like we ‘get it’ and fit in!
He, together with the team he has hired, are interested in our input – -what we need / want /long for etc. And they’re asking two simple questions:
1) If you could spend a few days with fellow BT’s and have the perfect schedule of classes, lectures, discussions, activities, etc – what would you want included in the curriculum/schedule?
2) If you had the money and the time, what would you do to help other BTs make the transition – or maintain the transition – more smoothly?
Do you have any strategies to make your Teshuva more effective this year?
Do you draw on your early Teshuva days for inspiration?
Do you have actuals tools and techniques and processes or do you just try to be generally better?
Any other Elul thoughts to share?
Should we be more tolerant of non-observant Jews.
4. “Our forefather Abraham was tested with ten trials and withstood all of them. This shows the love our forefather Abraham had [for G-d].”
9. “Seven things apply to an uncultured person (Heb. ‘golem’), and seven to a wise person.
A wise person does not speak before one who is greater than he in wisdom or years;
he does not interrupt his fellow;
he is not rushed to respond;
he asks relevant questions;
he answers accurately;
he discusses first things first and last things last;
on what he did not hear, he says ‘I did not hear;’ and he admits to the truth.
The opposite of these is true of the golem.”
13. “There are four character types among people.
One who says ‘what’s mine is mine and what’s yours is yours’ is of average character, and some say – this is the character of Sodom.
[One who says] ‘what’s mine is yours and what’s yours is mine’ – is unlearned (lit., [of] the people of the land).
[One who says] ‘what’s mine is yours and what’s yours is yours’ – is pious.
[One who says] ‘what’s yours is mine and what’s mine is mine’ – is wicked.”
14. “There are four types of temperaments.
One who is quick to become angry and quick to calm down – his gain is outweighed by his loss.
One who is slow to become angry and slow to calm down – his loss is outweighed by his gain.
One who is slow to become angry and quick to calm down is pious.
One who is quick to become angry and slow to calm down is wicked.”
15. “There are four types of students.
One who is quick to understand and quick to forget – his gain is outweighed by his loss.
One who is slow to understand and slow to forget – his loss is outweighed by his gain.
One who is quick to understand and slow to forget – this is a good portion.
One who is slow to understand and quick to forget – this is a bad portion.”
19. “Any love which is dependent on something, when the ‘something’ ceases, the love ceases. Any love which is not dependent on anything will never cease. What is a love which is dependent? The love of Amnon for Tamar. What is a love which is not dependent? The love of David and Yehonasan.”
20. “Any dispute which is for the sake of Heaven will ultimately endure, and one which is not for the sake of Heaven will not ultimately endure. What is a dispute for the sake of Heaven? This is a debate between Hillel and Shammai. What is a dispute not for the sake of Heaven? This is the dispute of Korach and his assembly.”
23. “Yehuda ben (son of) Taima said, be bold as a leopard, light as an eagle, swift as a deer, and strong as a lion to do the will of your Father in Heaven.”
25. “He (Yehuda ben Taima) used to say,
at five [one should begin the study of] Scriptures;
at ten, Mishna;
at thirteen [one becomes obligated in] the commandments;
at fifteen [the study of] the Talmud;
at eighteen the wedding canopy;
at twenty to pursue;
at thirty strength;
at forty understanding;
at fifty counsel;
at sixty old age;
at seventy fullness of years;
at eighty spiritual strength;
at ninety bending over;
at one hundred it is as if he has died and passed on from this world.”
26. “Ben (son of) Bag Bag said, turn the Torah over and over for everything is in it. Look into it, grow old and gray over it, and never move away from it, for you will find no better portion than it.”
27. “Ben (son of) Hai Hai said, according to the effort is the reward.”
What are your post Tisha B’Av thoughts?
Appreciation of food?
Listening to music again tomorrow?
Vacation time?
Commitment to do your part in rebuilding the Bais Hamikdash?
Less Loshon Hara and Sinas Chinam?
Countdown to Elul?
Glad the 3 weeks are over?
What else?
In public situations is it wise to give Baalei Teshuva kibbudim (honors) at the risk of embarassment?
Situations include
– Leading the bentching
– Saying a beracha at a Sheva Berachos
– Saying a harachamim at a Bris
– Getting an Aliyah in shul
– Getting hagbah or gelilah
– Opening the aron
In what cases and situations do you think it would be appropriate or inappropriate to give the honor to a relatively new BT?
What’s it like raising FFB kids as a BT?
How do your kids feel about it?
In what ways do you feel deficient?
In what ways do you feel being a BT makes you more qualified?
How do your kids feel about it, are they glad they have BT parents or do they wish their parents were FFBs?
What advice would your FFB kids have for BT parents?
The new Mishanayos Yomi cycle start on Sunday July 4th with Masechta Berachos.
You learn 2 mishnayos a day and you can finish all of Shas in 5 1/2 years.
It’s not hard and it’s a great accomplishment.
There are audio files here which take only 5 minutes per day.
Rav Grossman also has audio files of the entire Mishna.
And here’s the schedule for the remainder of 5770.
The http://www.mishnahyomit.com/ site also has some good resources.
You can download the entire Blackman translation of the Mishnayos at HebrewBooks.org.
Here’s the entire Mishna online in Hebrew.
Why not start now, you won’t regret it.
Do you feel that “fitting in” is one of the biggest challenges facing BTs?
What factors have you seen contribute to being successful in this area?
What are some strategies if you’re committed to Torah Judaism, but feel the “fitting in” goal is too difficult?
In November 2008, we all did our part in helping Leah Larson win the $100,000 grand prize in the Wells Fargo’s Someday Stories Contest.
Well now we all have a another chance to help our fellow Jews. Lancaster Yeshiva is entered in Pepsi’s $50,000 good idea contest.
A Beyond BT reader describes the Lancaster Yeshiva:
First it was the Mikvah. When the Rabbi arrived in this dwindling Jewish community right in the middle of Amish country, one of his first projects was to build a Mikvah. With the assistance of several congregation members, they raised penny after penny until finally the Mikvah was built. But that was just the first step in attempting to revitalize the kehilla.
Next it was the Yeshiva. Indeed, it is not your ordinary off-the-block Yeshiva. Geared towards bochurim who sometimes fall in between the cracks, the kind who want to be in a yeshiva but are more talented in the hands-on department. The Yeshiva provides a combination of morning learning with afternoon vocational training in residential construction. It is well suited for the kind of bochurim who don’t see themselves as academically oriented and need something different than just sitting all day and learning. As such, it serves a vital need in the Jewish community at large. And it seems to be succeeding. From a recent article in Mishpacha Magazine:
“We started the yeshiva shelo lishmah,” Rabbi Sackett says, “as a means to a different end, as a means to building up the Lancaster community.But before we knew it, we were doing it lishmah. The yeshiva took on a life and a reason for being all its own.”
In other words, in teaching boys how to build, the Lancaster Yeshiva Center accomplishes an even bigger objective it builds up the boys themselves.
But of course running a Yeshiva requires funds. It’s not often that such an easy opportunity to take part in a Mitzva comes along. You’ll be helping this unique Yeshiva itself, and at the same time showing some hakoras hatov to the Lancaster Jewish community by helping it grow into a more vibrant kehilla. Anyone who has been to Hershey park and benefited from the Kosher stand has benefited from the Lancaster Jewish community.
With just a few clicks of the mouse you can help the Yeshiva – http://www.refresheverything.com/LancasterYeshivaCenter – so hurry up vote early and vote often (once a day – per email address) and don’t forget to spread the word!
