Many BT’s became committed to Torah Observance after some type of Transformational Experience.
These experience can be a first Shabbos, a trip to Israel, a Discovery seminar, etc.
Did you have a transformational experience? What was it?
Many BT’s became committed to Torah Observance after some type of Transformational Experience.
These experience can be a first Shabbos, a trip to Israel, a Discovery seminar, etc.
Did you have a transformational experience? What was it?
The answer to the question “What Is Judaism?” would be different for a student of comparative religion, a Sephardic resident of an Israeli development town, or someone who grew up in an assimilated Jewish family in America, just to give a few disparate examples. I will address the last one of these, because of course I have the most familiarity with his mindset.
Ethics are of fundamental interest to anyone who cares about anything, but the idea that there are no ethics for the Jew other than those that emanate from the Torah distinguishes Judaism from all that came before and all that comes after.
Judaism is, of course, objectively identifiable as an essential source of guidelines for ethical living. Because of the richness of Judaism’s intellectual tradition, and because that richness has the quality of being both ancient and in constant scholarly and practical agitation, Judaism is probably the best developed system of ethics in the world in both its scope and its depth.
But while all that matters to every searching person, every person of conscience, it is not the heart of Judaism. It is necessary but not sufficient. Rather, the central concept is that while our ethics, as well as our laws regarding how people interact with each other even in non-ethical spheres, are completely open to intellectual probing, challenge and debate, they are absolute. They are based on the Torah given at Mt. Sinai, which we can only understand through the received tradition.
That is why between each chapter of Pirkei Avos we find the recitation, “Moshe received the Torah at Sinai, etc.”: It reminds us that although we are talking about ethics, regarding which everyone feels qualified to opine, ultimately all our hypotheses, speculations and gut feelings bow to the revealed truth of Torah.
One fundamental corollary of this double-barreled premise – that Truth only comes via Torah, which only comes via Mesorah [“received tradition“] – is that the Truth may conflict with our personal sensibilities, which non-Jewish culture teaches should be supreme.
But our idea of what is right and true and good is necessarily flawed. We are imperfect because of our distance from God, which is axiomatic in being creatures of flesh and blood. We cannot know and understand all, and our capacities for reasoning, empathy, objectivity and foresight are only human. Even at our best, we are tainted by a lifetime of interaction with other imperfect creatures and their ideas, most of whom do not acknowledge the Truth of Torah at all.
The bombshell corollary of this core concept is that not only ethics, but actions – all actions – are governed by the Truth of Torah. This not only separates Judaism from most world religions and moral systems, but presents a fundamental challenge to every possible concept of what my posited non-religious American Jew can have thought about his life, why it matters, and what he does with it. This Truth defines our relationship and responsibility to the rest of Creation. Now sit and learn!
The Inner Meaning of Birkas HaChamah- Motza’ei Shabbos 3/14 at 9:15 PM – CAY
Motza’ei Shabbos March 14 at 9:15 pm at Congregation Ahavas Yisroel in Kew Gardens Hills
Chofetz Chaim Heritage Foundation Video Presentation
“The Inner Meaning of Birkas HaChamah.â€
Rabbi Avrohom Chaim Feuer
Rabbi Paysach Krohn.
Suggested donation is $10.00.
The story is told of a simple woman who attended synagogue regularly, and would weep each year when the story of Yosef and his brothers was read. Her behavior was so predictable that it became a bit of a synagogue joke. Those who sat near her would anticipate her cries each year when the story of Yosef being sold into slavery was read.
One year she did not cry.
Her fellow congregants were so surprised that after services they asked her why it was that every year she cried for Yosef, and this year she did not.
She replied in all sincerity, “If he is stupid enough to go to them again this year after what they did to him for the past ten years, then I’m not crying for him.”
This year on Purim, I had a sense of déjà vu as we read the Book of Esther. It seemed to me that there were no surprises- and it wasn’t just because I had heard the story before. You see, Haman, the wicked man, acted exactly as wicked people have acted in all generations. Mordechai, the Rabbi, acted exactly as Rabbis do, urging people to maintain high standards, and leading them in teshuva and renewal in times of crisis. Even Esther, the heroine of the story, acts in a most predictable fashion. In times of crisis- when her nation needs her help- she proceeds to do what needs to be done for the benefit of her people.
To the point that I began to wonder why the Book of Esther was recorded at all. After all, I couldn’t find a single extraordinary event in the entire story. Haman’s behavior, Mordechai’s behavior, and Esther’s behavior are most predictable. Even Achashveirosh, the king, gets swayed, first by one prime minister, then by another, in a most predictable fashion.
But I believe that therein lies the lesson of the Meggilah. Because, although the behavior of the characters was predictable, they still had free choice to do either good or bad. Haman could have chosen not to attempt genocide. Mordechai could have chosen to shirk his responsibility as a leader of the Jewish people, and Esther could easily have refused to cooperate with the plan of salvation. The actualization of what we could have predicted is the expression of free choice which is celebrated in the story of the Meggilah.
Often in life we experience the opportunity to actualize a predictable surprise. For example, if someone were to call you to be the tenth in a minyan for a neighbor who needs to say kaddish, your good natured response is fairly predictable. Likewise, if your sibling, who is responsible, needs a short term loan to avoid credit
card debt, and you have the money, we could anticipate your response with a fair degree of accuracy. Nevertheless, there is free choice, and when you actualize the predictable, it is still considered monumental.
The lesson of Purim is not in people acting in a way that is surprising. The behavior of the key characters is fairly predictable. The lessons of Purim are that there is evil in the world, that good people should do good things, and that when they do, G-d will intervene to orchestrate salvation.
With best wishes for a wonderful Shabbos,
Rabbi Mordechai Rhine
Young Israel of Cherry Hill
Torah Links of Cherry Hill
www.teach613.org
I am perplexed: Sometimes one person in a family does Teshuva and the rest of the family remains uninterested, but sometimes one person’s road to Teshuva is a catalyst for the whole rest of the family. What’s the difference?
If anyone has any insights or stories to share on this issue, I’d be happy to hear them.
E.L.
I spent a lot of time a few years back trying to clarify the whys and hows of the mitzvah of Drinking on Purim. My Rav, Rabbi Welcher, feels that the main thrust of the mitzvah is to foster feelings of friendship and achdus in line with the other mitzvos of the day. However he states clearly that drinking to the point where somebody is out of control would be beyond the bounds of the halacha.
So in line with the theme of Achdus, this is probably a good time to give a Purim group hug. To realize that we are all on the same team and that includes people following a different derech and Rabbonim giving a different psak from the one we are following.
The biggest kindness we can do for somebody is helping them get closer to Hashem and that is our primary goal here at Beyond Teshuva. Hopefully, we all realize that we can use improvement in the areas of hearing, listening, understanding and communicating – essential skills in the process of spreading Kedusha.
Let us all rededicate ourselves to Jewish Achdus as we use the holiday of Purim for the purpose it was intended.
First published March 14, 2006
I have been trying to do my part by engaging in a little non-professional kiruv. Nothing formal or pushy, something along the lines of working to encourage friends and associates to become more Jewishly involved and educated.
There are a number of Jews in my office included my boss, a number of co-workers and a number of people working under me. They are not religious but also not completely disinterested.
I was wondering what others think about encouraging them to become more Jewishly involved. Should I treat my boss and subordinates different then my co-workers.
Thanks
Eugene
The difference of just two words can make all the difference. I learned that today.
I’m the college professor of English, journalism, and public speaking for Yeshiva at IDT, a yeshiva program for bochurim who learn Gemara in the Beis Midrash in the morning, and earn a bachelor’s degree in the afternoon. I travel two days a week from my home in Highland Park to the IDT building in Newark, NJ, which is a 90-minute journey each way.
Since I don’t have a parking pass, and you have to wait till someone dies to get one (or you have a very good friend you can borrow one from), I park my car about a half-mile away from the station where it’s legal to park, and walk to the station, toting my overstuffed briefcase and dreaming of parking passes the whole way.
My good friend, Vicky Krief, works for IDT. She is the fortunate holder of the coveted parking pass, so she is able to park in the train station. If I’m lucky enough to be on the same train as her coming home from classes (which happens often), she gives me a lift to my parked car, saving me the walk when it’s cold, dark, and my feet hurt from teaching all afternoon.
Earlier today, Vicky asked me if I would be at work, and I replied that I would be, and I hoped to see her on the train, unless I caught the one before, which sometimes happens. She replied that I should wait for her because she had THE CAR. I figured that from her point of view, it was worth delaying my departure a few minutes so that I’d have the advantage of her giving me a lift from the train station.
At the end of my class period I got an email from Vicky asking if I was leaving and I replied ‘yes’, and shut down my computer and packed up to go. I walked outside and waited in the usual spot for the Light Rail that shuttles me to the Newark Train station. No Vicky, as I was expecting. I boarded the train, and then my cell phone rang. It was Vicky asking me where I was. “On the train, where are you?†I replied. She answered, “I’m waiting for you! I told you I have THE CAR. I’m in the parking lot!â€
Oh, she had the car. At IDT. It never occurred to me that this is what she meant. Creature of habit, I just presumed it was the usual ‘I have the car in the train parking lot.’ Likewise, it didn’t dawn on Vicky that she had to spell it out anymore than telling me that she had the car. Wasn’t it clear to me what “I have the car†means?
As I’m on the train, Vicky is texting me over and over again, first with apologies for the miscommunication, and then with general chattiness and I’m getting really worried. I stop texting her back because I don’t want to encourage this dangerous habit, as I visualize her negotiating the highway with her blackberry on her lap, poking at the keyboard while she drives. My absence from texting only serves to fuel Vicky’s concern further that she has upset me by leaving me on the train and not giving me the opportunity for a ride home. She continues texting. Finally I spell it out. “Don’t text me while driving. It’s okay. I’m fine with the train.â€
To which she texts back: “I’m not driving. Nachum ( another friend of ours who also works for IDT who understood he was driving home with Vicky) was actually driving her car home while she was texting me. I felt much better and we chatted by text all the way home, her in the car, and me in the train. I got out of the train and began my long walk to my car, and a few blocks away, there were Nachum and Vicky waiting for me in her car – so that she could give me a lift to my car from the train station, per usual. Now, that’s a really good friend.
And so, today it struck me in a visceral way why Hashem in all His wisdom, gave us the oral law. “When I instructed you to bind them as a sign upon your arm and let them be totafos between your eyes, let me tell you what I really meant by that. . .
Vicky and I only had the written communication; we needed the oral as well. ‘I have THE CAR.’ What exactly does that mean?
Torah Judaism is actually an ideal that was never really fulfilled by the Jewish people themselves. Ever. But first, what is Torah? The word itself comes from hora’ah–teaching, and it means just that: a code of conduct which applies to every aspect of life. As the verse says, “in all your ways know Him (G-d).”
On a deeper level, Torah is a direct projection of the Divine Mind which makes the rectification of all reality, with Israel the bearers of the Messianic mantle, basically a done deal. What an awesome role, to be called upon to makes ourselves whole, to make the whole universe whole! To link our consciousness with the Divine Mind! Ultimately, the Torah is the means to remedy a cosmic exile, the self-exile of this world from its own real, optimal state. Thus, everything we do can either further this goal or temporarily obstruct it. The way we do everything we do can literally heal the world. It’s our choice, and the Torah is our manual.
So, perhaps the most basic thing that characterizes Torah living is a sense of mission, of grand purpose. There’s a Divine framework to the human condition, to the situation we’re in. There’s a Divine structure to history. We’re plugged in.
So, how does this manual work? The Torah is like a body, and the mitzvot are the limbs. Basically the Torah and its mitzvot are our personal and collective job, nothing less. But please, don’t be discouraged by “Torah living” as most people conceptualize it today. Can you imagine driving a car with half your body paralyzed? Well, no. You can’t. So instead you get a machine you can run. That’s Torah living as most people understand it. But real Torah living– step on board for the glorious ride and strap on your seat belts. It’s a work in progress.
–Micha Lindenberg
The casual observer of the current presidential polling data requires little expertise to identify a trend stretching back over the last two presidential elections. The population of the United States has been, and continues to be, split almost 50-50 in their support for a national leader.
At the same time, however, the division of country on a national level stands out in sharp contrast to what is happening locally. In his new book, The Big Sort: Why the Clustering of Like-Minded America Is Tearing Us Apart, author Bill Bishop demonstrates how communities are becoming increasingly homogenous as people sort themselves into demographic cliques. The most striking irony, Mr. Bishop explains, is how the increasing singularity of ideas and values in neighborhoods across the country is resulting in increasing divisiveness throughout the country as a whole.
The statistical evidence is compelling. In 2004, in an election decided nationally by one closely contested state (Ohio) and less than 1% of the electorate, almost half the counties in the country recorded landslide victories locally for either one candidate or the other, nearly double the percentage recorded in 1976.
Here are a few samplings from Mr. Bishop’s introduction:
Freed from want and worry, people were reordering their lives around their values, their tastes, and their beliefs. They were clustering in communities of like-mindedness, and not just geographically. Churches grew more politically homogeneous during this time, and so did civic clubs, volunteer organizations, and, dramatically, political parties. People weren’t simply moving. The whole society was changing…
Marketing analyst J. Walker Smith described the same phenomenon as extreme and widespread “self-invention,” a desire to shape and control our identities and surroundings. Technology, migration, and material abundance all allow people to “wrap themselves into cocoons entirely of their own making,” Smith wrote. People are unwilling to live with trade-offs, he said…
As people seek out the social settings they prefer — as they choose the group that makes them feel the most comfortable — the nation grows more politically segregated — and the benefit that ought to come with having a variety of opinions is lost to the righteousness that is the special entitlement of homogeneous groups. We all live with the results: balkanized communities whose inhabitants find other Americans to be culturally incomprehensible; a growing intolerance for political differences that has made national consensus impossible; and politics so polarized that Congress is stymied and elections are no longer just contests over policies, but bitter choices between ways of life.
Is it ever possible for there to be too much agreement? The mishna teaches that if the entire Sanhedrin votes to convict the defendant in a capital case without a single dissention, the death penalty cannot be given. No matter how overwhelming the evidence, the sages did not trust their own objectivity if none of their members could find even one mitigating factor. Brothers cannot testify together in beis din because they share a common perspective that calls into question their collective objectivity.
The more single-minded a group becomes in its opinions, the more calcified its thinking becomes in its evaluation of unfamiliar ideas, and the more quickly it rejects and condemns opposing viewpoints. Moreover, homogenous groups are more likely to devolve into parodies of themselves, shifting to ever-more extreme positions and allowing arguments that might once have been rational to descend to dogma and character assassination.
This is why candidates lean to the extremes in primary elections, laboring to attract support from the farthest wing of their respective parties, the one that is generally the loudest and most vehement. Then, once they have secured the nomination, the candidates tack back to the center for the general election to try and attract voters from across the political divide. Whichever side eventually claims victory will almost inevitably shift back again to the extremes, fearful of antagonizing the clamoring minority by appearing too moderate.
This is certainly one angle of the mishna in Pirkei Avos that praises machlokes l’sheim shomayim: when debate and dispute are motivated by a genuine desire to achieve true understanding, then such debate endures by producing greater clarity, by yielding new truths, and by bringing together ideological opponents who are devoted to intellectual honesty and ideological integrity.
Such was the nature of Beis Hillel and Beis Shammai, who fought fiercely in the study halls but retained love and respect for one another. One has to wonder, given the increasing factionalism within the Torah world, whether students of the two academies would even speak to one another if they were alive today.
After the death of his main disciple, Reish Lakish, Rabbi Yochanon lamented that he had no one to challenge him any more. By posing 24 problems to every law his rebbe taught him, Reish Lakish stimulated the learning of Torah in a way that benefited both students and teacher. The replacement the sages found, Rav Eliezar ben P’das, brought 24 proofs for everything Rabbi Yochanon said, literally driving him mad.
The ideological differences between the different camps within the Torah world are not (yet) so insurmountable that we have any justification for refusing to bear one another’s company. This does not require compromising one’s principles. Rather, it requires a willingness to concede that the world is a sufficiently complex place to allow the coexistence of different but equally legitimate points-of-view, and to not be afraid that the slightest exposure to alternative outlooks within the mainstream of Torah thought will somehow lead to a swift descent down the slippery slope of apostasy.
When two or three schools in one neighborhood, only marginally different in Torah philosophy and united by their inability to make payroll, are each graduating classes of only five or ten students, when men choose to walk into one shul half-an-hour late on Shabbos morning rather than walking into a shul across the street on time because its parishioners wear a different style of kippot, clearly our commitment to the unity of Klal Yisroel is sadly wanting.
From the earliest days of the twelve tribes, the greatest strength of the Jewish people has been our ability to forge diversity into unity. How ironic, and how tragic, that now we have become united against one another.
What does “observant†really mean?
Is somebody who is Shomer Shabbos but transgresses some other Torah law, observant?
Should we judge Judaism by the Jews?
Why or why not?
The guest speaker was the world famous Ba’al Teshuvah Moshe (Mark) Wahrburg. Moshe’s story was so inspiring it never failed to fill halls and shuls with enthralled audiences. He had reached the pinnacle of fame and success in Hollywood and lived a life of debauchery and excess. And then he threw it all away after discovering his heritage, eventually becoming fully Orthodox.
The men and women in the audience were taken in by the drama and ultimate glorious ending.
A group of angels were congregating at the window, unseen. They were staring at the man in the last seat of the second row.
He was a very unspectacular looking middle aged fellow dozing off. Yet, the angels were staring at him and whispering in awe. He was a somewhat successful accountant whose biography for the most part mirrored 90% of the rest of the room.
But what no one could possibly know, and if they would know they would most likely look at him with disgust and disdain, was how he had in the past done some pretty immoral things and had somehow pulled himself away and quietly done true teshuva. In fact he himself cringes when he thinks of his past actions.
There’s no glamour in that Teshuva. No one will come hear his sordid tale. And he himself has no clue of his heroics and that is precisely what makes it so lofty…
Yet here was a group of angels quivering in his shadow..because angels..they see a different world.
I believe that the ultimate manifestation of Torah Judaism is Chesed, acts of loving-kindness. It’s not the number of times one davens in a day, or the type of kippah he wears, or if her hair is covered completely, not at all, partially, or only sometimes. It’s whether all that davening and all those halachic guidelines and all that learning yields a better person, a better Yid. Does the person smile more, give others the benefit of the doubt more frequently, look for ways to make peace with others (instead of always getting his/her way), help others in time of need (whether it’s a seat on the bus, or picking up a dropped object, or bringing a meal to a new mother/sick friend/random member of the community), encourage children to play with those who seem to have no friends?
If all of that learning and studying and rushing to classes and davening does not make one a better person, then it does not matter to me how many of the mitzvot that person observes, or how stringent; it means they are not taking the Torah’s lessons to heart.
Years ago, I was surrounded by loving, kind, and generous observant Jews, and that spurred me to grow in my own observance. I believed that the Torah guidelines make for a pretty good foundation for life, and I still believe that. We must always keep the big picture in mind.
This is the first in a series of defining Torah Judaism for our non observant co-religionists in 500 words or less.
Dear BBT
I’ve been reading your site for a while and you often talk about happiness and spiritual pleasure. Do BTs (or FFBs) really experience spiritual pleasure? And if they do can you describe it and tell me what activities help to experience it?
Thanks
-Jay
By Elyah Leboff
As a religious Jew, it is almost inevitable that you will be asked questions about Judaism. There is a tendency to overreact to such encounters, viewing them either as a great outreach opportunity, or as a holy war. Due to this, questions are either completely misinterpreted, or fired at with a machine gun when a water pistol would suffice. What could have been a pleasant encounter often turns into an ugly debate. In this post, I hope to point out some of the most serious errors to watch out for when answering questions
1. It’s okay if people disagree with you. It is a sign of maturity and self-confidence to accept this. Furthermore, it is unrealistic to expect that you can force other people to think exactly the way you do.
2. Distinguish between a question and a statement. Recognize that you are not always being invited to share your opinion. For example, if someone says, “I think Judaism is out-dated,†the most appropriate response would be, “Oh.†Starting to debate would only make you appear hostile and intolerant.
3. Short and sweet. Even when someone asks a question, keep in mind that they might not necessarily have the patience for the most elaborate answer that you are able to present. Start with a simple “yes,†or “no,†you’ll be surprised how often you won’t need more than this!
4. Clarify the question. Asking, “What do you mean?†or, “What do you think?†can be very helpful for doing this. Until you understand the question in very specific and concrete terms, it is practically impossible to give a satisfactory answer.
5. Make sure your answer is appropriate for the questioner. Sometimes a person may be sincere about his question, yet his dedication to Judaism may not be strong enough yet to handle certain information. For example, someone who is not yet capable of being Shabbos observant, yet is asking to learn the laws of Shabbos. Under such circumstances it may be best to politely delay giving a response. The answers, otherwise, are likely to do more harm than good.
6. “I don’t know.†Is okay to admit. The humility to admit your limitations, expressing confidence that an answer does exist, and perhaps an invitation to read something or meet someone who does know, will probably make a favorable impression. On the other hand, fumbling your way though a half-baked answer is not very likely to impress anyone.
7. Dealing with family requires a serious examination of your relationship. If communication has generally been difficult, and support has generally been lacking, wielding the “absolute truth,†is not going to suddenly be a magic spell to win anyone over to your point of view.
8. Answer a person’s other needs. When you take the initiative to provide a person with food, honor, respect, sympathy, and empathy, this is likely to have a much greater impact than answering their occasional philosophical doubts.
Many times in the past on this blog, we’ve discussed the extremely high costs of Orthodox Jewish life, from kosher food to tuition. A good friend of this blog, Ezzie of SerandEz, has set out to determine just what it costs singles, couples, and families to live in different Orthodox communities. To that end, he has created a survey to determine just how much it is that people spend, and it has been quite the eye-opener for many.
Please take the survey, read the introduction to understand just what it’s for, and help build a better economic future for the Jewish community. Then send it along to all your family and friends so they can do the same.
By Aliza Hausman
http://www.alizahausman.net
When I was converting to Judaism, I asked a rabbi if I could walk into a church again. I wasn’t planning on returning for services but I had my sights on visiting the Sistine Chapel someday. It was also a question that bothered many of my Christian friends, particularly my friend, Cynthia.
going back.
Read the rest of the article here.
We’re all aware of the passing of Rabbi Noach Weinberg this past week. As you may know, one of Rabbi Weinberg’s most important projects was to get lay people involved in Kiruv.
What would it take for you to be more active in Kiruv?
1) Having tools and techniques to reach out.
2) Knowing that I would have some success in helping people become observant.
3) Internalizing the belief that every piece of Torah learned or mitzvah performed is valuable in and of itself.
4) Sensitizing myself to the tremendous chesed of bring people closer to Hashem.
5) Realizing that being aware of and acting on opportunities to bring people closer will tremendously help my own Yiddishkeit.
6) Having a clearing understanding that I have an obligation to do Kiruv under the mitzvah of Ahavas Hashem.
Rabbi Daniel Grama
I never really understood why we eat Carob, until recently. I give a weekly class to secular couples, and one week I found myself particularly stuck. Nothing was coming to mind. A friend suggested that I discuss the forthcoming Tu B’Shvat. While I know that the mishna lists it as one of the four Roshei HaShana, and the Ba’alei Machshava and Kabalah make a big deal out of it, to me it had no meaning beyond choosing between my favourite annual fruit and the unpopular Carob. So…..
Both Tanach and Chazal reveal a unique connection between the greatest of Hashem’s creations, Man, and His more basic creation of trees. Devorim (20,19) the Torah tells us that we may not destroy fruit trees, “For man is [like] the tree of the field.” Dovid HaMelech writes in Sefer Tehillim (92,13) that “the wicked grow like the grass and the righteous grow like a date tree.” Mesechet Gittin (57a), writes that when a child is born one should plant a tree.
Parsha Bereishis reveals a fascinating distinction between the creation of trees in contrast to the creation of the rest of the world. “B’Eser Ma’Amarim Nivrah Ha’Olamâ€, with ten utterances the world was created. Throughout the awesome event, a straightforward system was employed; Hashem said “and let there be… and then there was…..” Animals, stars, moon, night or day the process was the same, Hashem said it, Baruch Sh’omair, and that item came into existence, V’oseh. And once created, there was no need for follow-up. The creations would continue to exist or grow on their own. There was one exception. In perek 2 pasukim 8 & 9, the pasuk says, “And Hashem planted a garden in Eden, in the east, and He put there man that He created.” The next pasuk reads, “Hashem nurtured (Tzimach) from the ground all trees that were pleasant to see and good to eat. The Tree of Life was in the garden and the Tree of Knowledge of good and evil.”
Read more Tu B’Shvat – Fruits of our Labor
R’ Moshe Schwerd on Tu B’Shvat and the Sin of the Eitz Hadas can be downloaded here