A Letter to My Brother – Explaining Some Lifestyle Choices

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This is the email I sent to my secular brother because he keeps asking me questions about my 21 year old son’s future. We live in Australia and he lives in America where I am from originally. It can be very challenging for BT’s to explain their lifestyle choices to the secular relatives. Even after 27 years of my being frum my relatives find my choices hard to understand. The Beyond BT readers may find this email of interest:

Dear ( ),

I have been thinking about your email in which you asked me some questions about Shmuli’s future, will he marry an American, if so will he live there, and so on and so forth.

I am sure you would agree that in life one can never anticipate all the myriad of possibilities of what could happen. Almost any given situation has an almost incalculable number of outcomes that could occur. It is logical then to assume that it would be futile to think that one is in total control or can avoid an outcome that one cannot anticipate. Simply put, we mortal finite beings cannot predict the future.

When one lives a life of Torah and mitzvos one gets used to living with a certain outlook. Basic to this outlook is the idea of having full trust in Hashem who runs the world. We have to do our part in this material world. We cannot sit around waiting for money to pour in from heaven like manna and everyone would agree that would be ridiculous. On the other hand, we also show a lack of trust in Hashem if we panic over the future, If we get worried and lose sleep over an unpaid bill or start to worry about what could happen in 2, 3, or 5 years from now. A Jew with trust and faith in Gd knows that at the end of the day we are not in control. If we did what we had to do, we worked at a job or a business for instance, we did the physical things necessary for something to happen, then we step back and let G-d do His job. Nothing can be granted us without Hashem’s bruchas. Our Torah learning and mitzvos make a vessel for Hashem’s bruchas.

So I cannot tell you the answer to your questions except for the following:
Shmuli is a young Lubavitcher scholar who is going to follow the Rebbe’s directives in all things in his llfe. The Rebbe wanted the young scholars to sit and learn Torah full time (after they receive their Rabbinic ordination) and look for a match at the same time. So that is what Shmuli is going to do in NY at 770 where he will learn Torah full time and G-d wiling prepare himself and work to finding his match. Then after marriage, as the Rebbe instructed, he will spend the first year learning Torah full time in Colel (yeshiva for married young men). After that he will start worrying about making a living. At that point all options are open to him: business, Rabbinics, shlichas (outreach), getting professional training, he wil decide after completing Colel.

We pray that with G-d’s help he will be successful, and if G-d forbid Moshiach should tarry, that he will find his match easily and quickly.

Shoshana was one of our original Beyond BT contributors and we want to thank her for thinking about the Beyond BT readership and sending us this email to post.

Vayikra, Shnayim Mikra, Learning Chumash

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The Gemara says in Brachos(8a – 8b) says:

“A person should always complete his [study of the parsha] with the congregation – [by studying] shnayim mikra v’echad targum. Anyone who does this will have long days and years.”

This obligation is codified in the halacha (Rambam Hilchos Tefilla 13,25; Shulchan Aruch O.C. 285,1).

The Ramchal in Derech Hashem writes that just reading the Chumash has tremendous spiritual ramifications. In addition, the more we understand it, the higher the spiritual influence.

As we know, Vayikra is probably the hardest book of the Chumash to relate to in the absence of sacrifices in our day.

Take a look at Rabbi Ari Kahn on The Mystery of Sacrifices or Rabbi Noson Weisz on Right to Life vs. Right Life for some deeper understandings.

Then pull out a Chumash, a Metsudah or an Artscroll and go through the parsha with Onkeleles, Rashi or the Art Scroll commentary. We need to make Torah a central component of our lives and learning the parsha regularly is an essential step.

As a final resource here is Rabbi Rietti’s outline of Vayikra. (You can purchase the entire outline of the Chumash here).

Vayikra
# 1 Korban Olah
# 2 Korban Mincha
# 3 Korban Shelamim
# 4 Korban Chatat
# 5 Korban Asham & Me’ila

# 1 Korban Olah
* Olat Nedava, individual free-will offering
* Ox / Sheep or Goat / Birds: Mature Doves or Young Doves
* Male
* Without blemish
* Completely burned on Mizbayach

# 2 Korban Mincha
5 Types:
1 Solet: Fine Flour Offering
2 Me’Afar Tanur: Challa & Rekikim
3 Machvat: Shallow Pan Offering
4 Marcheshet: Deep-Fry Offering
5 Shtey HaLechem: Double-Loaf Offering
* First four above are all Matza, the fifth is bread

1 Minchat Solet:
* Matza from Olive Oil, Flour & water, oil, mix, oil, Incense (levona), Kemitza, baked, oil, Salt.
* Kometz & Incense burned together on Altar
* Remainder of Mincha eaten entirely by Kohanim (Kemitza removed from raw dough, all other Mincha offerings, Kemitza removed after baking)

2 Minchat Me’Afar Tanur:2 types: Challa & Rekikim (wafers)
* Challa: Matza, baked on oven floor, no pan.
* Rekikim: Thin Matza wafers with oil smeared on in X shape. Made of Oil, flour & water, mixed, more oil, baked, Petita (folded several times till breaks into pieces) Incense added, Kemitza taken, salted and Kemitza burned on Altar, then remaining Matzot eaten entirely by Kohanim.

3 Minchat Mahvat: Shallow Pan Offering
* Preparation same as deep fry offering, but no oil was poured after baking.
* Matza baked on oven floor without a pan, was thus more brittle.

4 Minchat Marcheshet: Deep-Fry Offering.
* Oil mixed with flour and water, again mixed with oil and baked in a deep mould, so dough was soft. After frying, they were folded till they were broken into pieces the size of one kezayit each. One Kemitza-full was burned on Altar, remaining Matzot were entirely eaten by the Kohanim.
* Don’t allow any Mincha to become Chametz
* Don’t add yeast or honey to any Mincha.
* Every Mincha must have salt added to it.
* No Mincha can be offered without salt.

5 Shtey-HaLechem: The Double-Loaf Offering
* Also known as ‘Korban Reishit.’
* Made with yeast and thus rose as Chametz and not Matzah.
* No Kemitza
* Not burned on Altar
* Each of the two doughs were prepared individually
* Accompanied the two lambs of the Korban Shelamim on Shavuot
* Each loaf measured 7 X 4 Tefachim. Corners projected vertically to height of 4 finger breadths.
* Every offering must be sprinkled with salt, no offering was permitted without being salted prior to being burned on the altar.

Minchat Bikkurim
* Also known as ‘The Omer.’
* It was the first offering of the new barley grain crop just grown.
* A communal offering, not individual, no new produce was allowed to be eaten till the Omer was cut on second night of Pesach
* The Omer was burned on the Altar
* Same preparation as other Mincha offerings except it was made from barley and not wheat.
* Its kernels of barley were roasted and then ground
* The Kohen waved the Omer N-S-E-W, then up & down.

# 3 Korban Shelamim
* Ox – Sheep – Goat
* Male or Female
* Without blemish
* Selected fats were burned on Altar
* Don’t eat any blood or fat. (acc. to Chinuch, these 2 are in Lev. 7:26)

# 4 Korban Chatat
Four Types of Sin Offerings: Kohen Gadol-Bet Din-Nassi-Yachid
1) Kohen Gadol:
* Semicha done by Kohen Gadol who sinned inadvertently
* Bull, blood sprinkled 7 times toward inner curtain & 7 times on corners of Inside altar, remaining blood spilled on curb of outside altar.
* Selected fats, the skin, innards, burned on outside alter, remainder burned outside Yerushalayim.
2) Bet Din:
* Brought if Sanhedrin of 71 erred in a ruling that carries Karet.
* One bull was brought for each tribe.
* Semicha done by three members of Sanhedrin.
* Bull brought by entire community that sinned based on incorrect legal decision of The Sanhedrin.
* Blood of bull sprinkled 7 times toward inner curtain & 7 times on corners of inner altar, remaining blood spilled on curb of outside altar.
* Selected fats, the skin, innards, burned on outside alter, remainder burned outside Yerushalayim.
3) The President – King
* Brought if the King or Nasi (head of Sanhedrin) violated a Mitzva that carries Karet.
* Male Goat
4) Individual
* She goat or lamb.
* Brought for sins committed unknowingly and punishable by Karet (43 types of violations, mostly forbidden relations).
* Offered in same location as Korban Olah.
* Blood sprinkled on outer Altar 4 times.

# 5 Korban Asham & Me’ila
The Korban Asham is brought for 3 reasons:
1. Lied in court under oath denying knowledge of a monetary case, then admitted he did bear witness to the case.
2. He forgot his status as Tameh or Tameh Met or Tameh from contact
with a zav, zava, nidda or Maga and ate Kodshim or he entered the Temple in any of the above states.
3. He made a Shavuah, oath to do or avoid something and then forgot his oath and violated his oath.
* The type of animal he brought as an Asham depended on his financial status. Thus, it was also termed an ‘adjustable offering.’
* A wealthy person brings a female lamb or goat on outer Altar.
* A poor person brings 2 mature doves or 2 young doves. One dove for an Olah, the other for a Chatat. The Olah is completely burned on the Altar. The Chatat bird was spread out, not allowed to split it. & completely eaten by the Kohanim of that shift. Only its blood is smeared on the Altar.
* A destitute pauper who cannot even afford 2 doves, brings a grain
offering called the Mincha Chata. No oil or levona is added The Kometz was burned on the altar, all the remaining Mincha is eaten by the officiating Kohanim of that shift.
Korban Me’ila (Also known as an Asham)
* Brought for the unintentional misuse of Kodshim, (property, food or utensils belonging to Bedek Habayit).
* Misuse to the amount of a Pruta worth is liable for a Korban Me’ila.
* An additional 20% tax called a is also paid.
* Then he brings a male ram worth at least 2 Sela.
Asham Taluy
* Brought if one is uncertain whether he committed a crime liable for Karet.
If certain that he committed a violation, he must bring a fixed Chatos.
* Male ram worth at least 2 Sela.
Asham Vadai
* Adds 20% tax.
Asham Gezelot
* One who knowingly denies under oath that he has an outstanding debt or property in his possession and later confesses, must pay back the money owed plus a 20% tax as a fine as well as bring a Korban Asham- Gezelot, a ram worth at least 2 Sela.

The Blinking Light of Bitachon

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The blinking message light on the telephone tortured me all of Shabbos day. My overly active writer’s imagination sent me over the edge into an emotional abyss that is entirely incompatible with a peaceful Shabbos.

Never, never, never, look at caller ID when the phone rings on Shabbos and you can’t answer the phone.

I learned that lesson once, and ten years later, I learned it again.

Ten years ago, I had gone for an annual check-up with my gynecologist who said, “I’ll only call you if there’s a problem to discuss.” And so, on Shabbos morning, when the phone rang, and I saw the caller ID from his office, I went into a complete panic. My mind raced all day long and by the end of that Shabbos I was terminally ill, and it was time to start getting my affairs in order. Except that when I listened to the message, it turned out to be the billing office calling with a question about my insurance. So ever since then, I told myself – if the phone rings on Shabbos, don’t look at caller ID because you can’t answer the phone, and you’ll only torture yourself.
Ever since then, I have been completely machmid with this rule…. Until today.

And I sure paid the price.

Tomorrow morning my brother is getting married. The entire family has been gathered in his location to celebrate, starting Friday night. Since my extended family is not observant, we chose not to attend any of these festivities over Shabbos, promising instead to show up early enough Sunday morning for the family photos before the chuppah.

Like any good story about a divorced man and a remarriage to a divorced woman, his shidduch is a miracle, this wedding is a miracle, and there has been plenty of drama associated with this union. I am on pins and needles as the chuppah draws near.

And so, when the phone rang on Shabbos day, like a magnet drawn to a piece of metal, my eyes could not resist glancing at the caller ID as my yetzer hara took my brain hostage: “I hope it’s not my mother, and that nothing is wrong.”

And it was. My mother’s cell phone. My stomach lurched. My imagination went into overdrive, where it stayed for the rest of Shabbos, which didn’t end until late in the evening.

My mother, although not observant herself, knows that she can’t call me on Shabbos. So my logical mind told me that therefore, there must be some terrible reason for her call. She wouldn’t call me on Shabbos to talk, or to tell me something that could wait till after Shabbos because she knows I can’t answer the phone. So, my mind rattled on, she is alerting me that there is an emergency. G-d forbid, the wedding is off, there has been a tragic accident, the chosson is in the hospital, the kallah has…. Okay, you fill in the blank…. I did, all afternoon long, writing story after story in my head.

I took long walks and tried imagining all the positive reasons she could have called, and then, when I couldn’t figure any of them out, I dug up inane reasons… like, can you please bring an extra pair of stockings when you come to the wedding? And when that didn’t work, I pleaded with Hashem, and I tried to sooth myself with gam zu letovah talk, and when none of that worked, I debated finding a non-Jew to call my mother, but my husband reminded me that this wasn’t pekuash nefesh, this was just me going out of my mind with worry. And so ultimately, I watched the clock, and paced, and apologized to Hashem for not being in Shabbos, even though Shabbos was in my home.

At the precise second I was allowed to call, I picked up the phone and dialed into voice mail, literally shaking and perspiring as I braced myself for….

My mother’s “butt call.” That’s what we call it when a cell phone calls the last number dialed without the cell-phone owner’s knowledge. (So-named from the days when we used to walk around with cell phones in our back pocket). All I heard on the answering machine was the sound of clinking glasses, laughing people, and joy.

Later confirmed…. I missed one heck of a party. Everyone is simchadig. It should be a beautiful chuppah. They missed me at the party. My mother had no clue that her phone had dialed mine by accident. Sorry.

Whew. Breathe. Lesson learned. Never, never, never, look at caller ID when the phone rings on Shabbos! I’m sorry, Hashem.

Retreats for BT Families

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There is a newly formed division of Ohr Somayach in Monsey led by Rabbi and Mrs Naftali Reich that is conducting year round weekend retreats for BT families at their gorgeous five star Beit Shvidler retreat center

There will be an inspiring Pre Pesach weekend family retreat on March 24th at the Center and we just heard that there are still a couple of vacant slots.

The retreat will have a cadre of world class presenters..our own Rabbi Label Lam, Rabbi David Refson, Mrs Chani Juravel, Rabbi Jonathen Rietti and others. The main theme is ‘How we can make Pesach alive for ourselves and our families’.

It starts on Friday sundown and concludes on Motzei Shabbat and a concurrent professional child care program will be available on the premises . There is an option available (at no extra charge!) to stay over on Saturday eve and benefit from some ‘hands on’ family guidance from Rabbi Avraham Braun and Mrs Rivky Reich on Sunday morning.

The all inclusive cost is $499 per couple and $120 per child and subsidies are available for those that wish to benefit from a highly discounted rate (no questions asked). We encourage you to benefit from this amazing experience! Registration is limited to twenty families in total to ensure a warm, intimate and inspiring environment.

For more info and a program itinerary please call the program directors Rabbi and Mrs Naftali Reich at 914-261-4580 or email to rabbilegacy@gmail.com

Of Slugs, Racquetball and Shabbat

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When people become observant, they often face certain delicate situations in the workplace, from struggling to find kosher food at meetings to having to leave early on Friday afternoons in the winter to be home for Shabbat. But for a division president of a $1.5 billion retailer, becoming frum led to its own set of challenges, both harrowing and humorous.

Yehoshua (Harry) Looks grew up attending a synagogue affiliated with the Reconstructionist Judaism movement. He was always attracted to the intellectual side of Judaism. After he married his wife Debbie, the couple moved around; from Ohio to New York, then a stop in Boston for business school, to St. Louis, to Baltimore, and back to St. Louis. After shopping around, they eventually joined a Conservative synagogue.

Yehoshua’s spiritual journey started after his rise in the ranks of Edison Brothers Stores. At age forty, after ten years with the company, Yehoshua was promoted to president of the company’s international division. At this juncture, seemingly fulfilled in life, Yehoshua began asking questions about the authenticity of the Torah. These questions ultimately became a spiritual crisis. Based on numerous conversations with the rabbi of the Conservative synagogue, the two men began learning one-on-one together, studying the Talmud and other Jewish sources. .

With his appetite for Jewish learning whetted, Yehoshua began to ravenously search for all Jewish sources he could find and began dedicating every spare minute to learning. He traded in his daily 5:30 am racquetball match for a Daf Yomi shiur.

A common challenge for people when they become observant is figuring out what to eat at business meetings and other events, and especially how to get kosher food in places far removed from Jewish communities. However keeping kosher was generally not a challenge for Yeshoshua, and it even helped him out of several sticky situations.

Yehoshua’s position took him on frequent business trips to China to check on factories and to open new offices. Before becoming religious, Yehoshua had been an adventurous eater and eagerly partook of the food at the lavish banquets during the trips. The feasts featured a varied assortment of Chinese delicacies, including meat of questionable origin and even insects.

However one food that Yehoshua could never develop a taste for was slugs, a common item at the dinners. “The fact that I could no longer partake of the meals for dietary reasons was a nice side benefit,” Yehoshua said, smiling.

As he become increasingly religious Yehoshua began bringing canned food with him wherever he went. Noticing this, his colleagues became concerned that he did not have enough to eat. One night in a restaurant in China a coworker, assuming that he could eat all vegetables, ordered for him a plate of string beans. A few minutes later the waiter brought a plate with a beautiful bed of string beans, crowned by lobster sauce filled with fresh pieces of seafood.

Yehoshua’s craving for learning went with him on his trips. Everywhere he went, he brought a Gemarah and his Daf Yomi cassette tapes. At the end of one trip to China, his long-haul flight back to America was delayed by fog in Shanghai.. So with extra time in the airport, Yehoshua sat in the business class lounge listening to his tapes to learn the day’s daf.

Within twenty minutes he was joined by two other frum Jews who were also stranded.. Yehoshua shared his tapes with them so they could learn as well.

“Here we were waiting in the airport in Shangai, fogged in, and three yidden were learning the daf!”

Yehoshua’s religious growth came with some challenges at work. One of his superiors in the company was particularly unsettled with Yehoshua’s need to leave early on Friday afternoons in the winter. The boss began keeping track to the minute the time that Yehoshua left each Friday, and became increasingly cold to him.

One Friday the executive called Yehoshua into his office. He angrily berated Yehoshua, accusing him of slacking on the job by leaving early.. After several minutes of harsh attacks he roared at Yehoshua: “What am I going to do if your business falls apart on Shabbat and you’re not there to take care of it?!”

Yehoshua responded with composure and delivered a prefect response:

“You’re going to fire me. If my business falls apart on one day, I’m obviously not doing my job.”

Yehoshua’s boss had no rebuttal. Yehoshua calmly turned and walked out of the office and his boss never said another word to him about Shabbat.

In 1994 the Looks family took a 10-day trip to Israel to tour and study. The trip solidified the religious direction that they were heading in.

As the trip came to a close, Yehoshua, Debbie and their three children all agreed that one day they wanted to come back.

That day came much faster than they expected. In November 1995 Edison Brothers declared bankruptcy. In April 1996, the company bought out Yehoshua’s contract and he left with a severance package commensurate with his 15 years experience at the company.

With their future now wide open, Debbie suggested the family take a one-year sabbatical in Israel. They sold their house and cars and moved to Yerushalayim. The one year became two and then became a commitment to make Israel their home.. Yehoshua eventually became a rabbi. Since then he has worked in outreach and Jewish education in Israel and America, using his years of business experience to help manage Jewish organizations..

Since leaving Edison Brothers, Yehoshua’s life has taken a far different course. Now instead of overseeing the production of clothing based on ephemeral fashion trends, he is living and disseminating a product that’s eternal. And he’s working for a Boss who doesn’t mind if he leaves early on Fridays.

————————————————————–
Michael Gros writes from Ramat Beit Shemesh, Israel. The Teshuva Journey column chronicles uplifting teshuva journeys and inspiring kiruv tales. Send comments to michaelgros@gmail.com
Published in The Jewish Press in July 2011

Teaching Tznius

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By Chaya Houpt
Originally posted on Chaya’s blog – All Victories

Last week, I dropped off three little Queen Esthers at gan. The holiday of Purim fell on Friday in Jerusalem this year, but this was the day the kids wore their costumes to school. Y.B. and A.N. and their friend Y entered their classroom and skipped off into a sea of princess-queens. The little boys were dressed as kings, and also alligators and policeman and all other kinds of disguises expressing a range of pint-size machismo. And my daughters and almost all the other girls were dressed as queens or princesses. There might have been a bride or two.

I thought about this post that I wrote last year about the contrast between pretty-pretty-princess culture and the Jewish concept of a princess. While the American cult of the princess ties her self-worth to her appearance, the Jewish model of female royalty is inner dignity and substance. I hoped that my attempts to reframe princesses in those terms would inoculate them against messages of the broader society. I wondered what would happen when they started preschool.

And here we are.

* * *

In past years, my girls have dressed up for Purim as a ladybug and a butterfly. And then a butterfly and a ladybug. And then two bees. This year, there was no discussion. They came home from gan with their plans fully formed: they would both dress as Queen Esther, just like Y and all their other friends.

We headed to the costume aisle of the local discount store. A.N. picked out a fabulous Disney-esque moon-and-star gown like this one. Y.B. spotted a costume labeled “Jasmine,” that I might have described more like “harem dancer.”

“Ooh, that one looks super-Persian, just like Queen Esther,” I observed. It really was pretty awesome-looking, all scarves and brocade and purple velvet.

Y.B. eyed the picture on the front of the package. A child model gazed out at us with all the provocative allure that an eight-year-old can muster. Y.B. noted the midriff-baring top. “That’s not tzanua,” she commented. Not modest. She’s only four, but she knows that.

“It’s okay,” I told her. “We’ll put a shirt underneath and make it tzanua.” She agreed and we tried it on and we picked out tiaras and a lion costume for B.A. (This doesn’t get said often, but toddlers are kind of easy. Especially boys). We were on our way.

* * *

Costume day arrived. The kids dressed with great excitement. Y.B. admired herself in the mirror. I felt swept along in the dress-up glee.

But something seemed off. Y.B.’s skirt was more like bunch of panels of tulle over transparent tulle pants. She was definitely looking more harem dancer than Persian queen. Not so appropriate for a preschooler.

“Y.B., I think you should wear this skirt under your costume. Look, it’s the same purple velvet as the shirt”

“No,” she said. “I like it the way it is.”

I tried again.

“Listen, I can see your legs. And it’s sort of hard to say whether that’s okay. For a little girl, it’s fine. And for a woman or a big girl, it’s not. And you are four-and-a-half, so you’re sort of a little girl and sort of a big girl. I’m telling you what I think. I think you should wear an extra skirt underneath. But I’m letting you decide.”

She chose not to add another layer. I appealed to my husband for help.

“You’re the one who told her it’s her decision,” he said. Rrrmmph.

I told Y.B. about when I was seven and I went as Sleeping Beauty for Halloween. It was an unseasonably cold October for Arizona, and my dad totally ruined my princess costume by making me wear long underwear.

“And you know, I was really mad at Poppy. But I was also warm,” I told Y.B. “Because Poppy loves me and he was taking care of me.”

Y.B. listened with interest. She did not put on the extra skirt.

* * *

I thought, how important is this? Yes, she was a little skimpily clad for a kid. But was I worried about her dignity being compromised? This is a person who still throws tantrums in public and thinks nothing of it. She’s four.

And you know, with parenting, I’m playing the long game. I want my daughters and my son to grow into people who intrinsically understand modesty and want to embody it. That’s not going to happen by me pulling rank and making Y.B. change her clothes. It’s only going to happen, with God’s help, if my husband and I continually model tzniut, modesty, and encourage it in our children.

It’s not like my dad and the long underwear—he just needed to keep his kid warm during a chilly night of trick-or-treating. He didn’t need to worry that I would rebel and become warm-clothing averse for the rest of my life. He was meeting a short-term parenting goal that evening.

It doesn’t really matter what little Y.B. wears on any given day. What counts is how she feels about herself and her own worth, and how she learns gradually to manifest self-respect in the way she dresses.

This is tricky for me because I came to the Torah’s approach to modesty as an adult. Well, I thought I was an adult. Let’s say an older teenager. Which is to say, I recognized my options. I was old enough by then to understand what it meant to be a woman in the world and the implications of how I presented myself physically.

My children, however, have heard about tzniut since before they could talk. They are learning the laws and social norms of dress before they know anything about their context, before they can appreciate the alternative.

And so I tread lightly, careful not to misrepresent the Torah as shaming or oppressive. I try to give my children background and rationales that they can appreciate on their level, so that they don’t think modesty is just one more thing parents say. You know, like “chew with your mouth closed” or “put your clothes in the hamper. Those directives are important, certainly, but not on the same level as the eternal will of God, right?

* * *

Returning to the clothing struggle. I gave up. By which I mean that I looked pleadingly at my husband.

He sat down on the couch with Y.B. and told her about Queen Esther. Told her how all the other girls called to the palace asked for extra adornments to enhance their appeal, but Esther relied on her own inner strength to carry her through. Esther was tzanua. Esther was a gibora, a heroine.

Y.B. went into the bedroom and put on the extra skirt. She looked beautiful.

We made a big deal about Y.B.’s strength and bravery. But that’s not really what counts.

Fisking Uncle Moishy

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Fisking is blogosphere slang describing a point-by-point criticism that highlights perceived errors, or disputes the analysis in a statement, article, or essay…A Fisking is characteristically an incisive and fierce point-by-point rebuttal, and the aim is generally to weaken the target’s credibility rather than seek common ground.
This article was partially inspired by Fisking Aunt Mary.

Dear Uncle Moishy,

Everyone’s faaaaaavrite Uncle. Well, you’re not mine. In fact, I’ve spoken to the oldest living members of both sides of my family and they have confirmed that we’re not even related. Moving forward, I’ve received your latest email regarding Shabbos and I will not take it sitting down.

You write:

“Shabbos is coming…”
as if to say that if you didn’t tell me that, I wouldn’t know it. Who died and made you the calendar?

You continue “…We’re so happy.”
Oh, YOU’re so happy. So, your saying that I’M not happy that Shabbos is coming?. Oh you’re soooooo frum.

“We’re gonna sing …”
Once again with the exclusionary language. I know I’m not a world renowned singing superstar like you but there’s no reason to get uppity about it.

“…and shout aloud.”
Oh that makes sense, shout at your family when shabbos preparations are lagging and candle lighting is approaching. Sounds like someone needs a heavy dose of some Marvelous Middos Machine.

Then, you simply repeat yourself with some more shouting, some whispering (I have no clue what that’s about) and telling things to the world (as if people in Bangladesh are actually buying your CDs).

Well, it felt good to get that off of my chest but if you think I’m finished, just you wait until you see my response to your “Hey Dum Diddly Dum” missive. Strap yourself in and hold on to your Mem hat, buddy.

All my love,

David (not your nephew)

Social Kosher Cookery

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One of the best kosher cooking sites we’ve seen is Culinary Kosher. It’s a social recipe site with lots of sharing.

A recent post aggregated 19 Purim Seudah Appetizers Choices.

Here’s the blurb:

With Purim (See our Purim Recipes & More page) right around the corner everybody has Purim Seudah on their mind. A great appetizer makes a big impression, especially on the men who often don’t even know what they are eating by time main dish rolls around. The good news is that below you will find a list of Purim Seudah appetizers that you will surely meet your criteria. The problem is to choose only one. Good Luck and Happy Purim!

Take a look before you choose your Purim menu.

How Have You Used the Achdus Enhancing Facilities of Purim?

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Purim is fast approaching.

How have you used Purim to increase your achdus to your fellow Jews?

1) Giving thoughtful gifts of Shaloch Manos to people.
2) Planning how to give my gifts to the poor.
3) Having a wonderful meal with friends and family.
4) Going to a Purim chagigah.
5) Appreciating the importance of unity as evidenced in the Megillah.
6) Something else.

Rabbi Noach Weinberg on Happiness

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Aish HaTorah’s Project Inspire sent an email in March 2006 with some thoughts from Rabbi Weinberg on the subject of happiness and suggested we share it with friends and family. Since we’re in the period of happiness in the Jewish Calendar we decided to repost it:

Rabbi Noach Weinberg on Happiness

1. There are many important things we all seek in life – happiness, love and success amongst others. Judaism teaches that a crucial tool for living is to have clear definitions for these important concepts.

People can often spend many years of life striving for something that they think will give them happiness – the right job, the right girl, working my way up the corporate ladder, retirement, the new home etc, but when they actually get it, they’re still miserable!

Why? – Because they didn’t take the time to define what happiness really is. Instead, they simply went for what society says will give them happiness or what they might feel might bring them happiness. Defining happiness would have saved them a lot of time and unnecessary pain.

People often say – you can’t define happiness. Interestingly, Judaism actually gives a definition. Let me explain.

2. If I offer you a thousand dollars for your eyes – is it a deal?
How’s about 10K? 100K? 1M?… As much money as I offer you, you’ll turn me down – right? Your eyes are worth more to you than all the money in the world.

3. So, now, imagine that I’m very wealthy, and after speaking to you for half an hour, I take a liking to you – so much so, that I say to you: let me give you this brief case as a gift. You take the brief case and open it up and look inside. You see wads of $100 bills. There’s a million dollars in there for you from me – no strings attached.
How would you feel – if it were really true? Wouldn’t you feel like a million dollars?! Wouldn’t you be doing a jig down the street?

Now, if you ask someone: You have eyes – how do you feel? Most people say: “the same miserable person I was before you asked me!” But, if our eyes are worth more to us than any money, and we’d feel ecstatic for the million, shouldn’t we feel even more ecstatic that we have eyes? Shouldn’t we be doing that jig down the street, all the more?

4. So what’s the problem?
The problem is that we get used to things – we take things for granted. Someone gets a beautiful Porsche for his birthday. He feels grand. Come back in a couple of months – he’s miserable again!

Happiness is therefore defined as the emotion of pleasure that we feel when we appreciate what we have.

Misery is the reverse. To be thoroughly miserable – just take all your blessings for granted, and focus on what you don’t have. The fact is that it’s much easier to focus on what you don’t have than what you do – we just slide right into it. It’s easier to get up in the morning and think: oh no – another work day at that miserable job… and I can’t believe it’s raining again…and I hate that train ride – especially all those weird & miserable people on the subway… and I wish my work-mates wouldn’t be so irritating…and my boss is so controlling…. etc

The trick of happiness is to learn how not to take things for granted.

If you can get used to your eyes you can get used to anything. You’ll get used to the new car, the new home, the new wife, the kids… If we don’t appreciate what we have – there’s no point getting any more – we’ll just get used to that too!
If you learn how to appreciate your eyes, you can learn how to appreciate all the gifts of life. That’s why every morning in Judaism we get up and say, thank you G-d for giving me life. We appreciate that we can think, see, have clothes, can walk, and that we have all our needs both physical and spiritual. We say blessings on food – to appreciate the food that we eat and not to take it for granted.

Each one of us has eyes, ears, a heart that pumps, hands and legs, friends and family – gifts worth more to us than any money. Each one of us is a walking multi-millionaire, even if we wouldn’t have a penny to our names. Only by learning how to appreciate the gifts we already have, how rich we truly are, can be truly happy.

Whitney Houston: Didn’t She Almost Have It All?

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Wikipedia says it this way: In 2009, Guiness World Records cited her as the most-awarded female act [performer] of all time. Her list of awards includes two Emmy Awards, six Grammy Awards, 30 Billboard Music Awards, and 22 American Music Awards, among a total of 415 career awards as of 2010. Houston was also one of the world’s best-selling music artists, having sold over 170 million albums, singles and videos worldwide.

So, didn’t she almost have it all?

Like all addicts, she knew what was missing – big time.

Rabbi Shais Taub in his wonderful book, God of Our Understanding: Jewish Spirituality and Recovery from Addiction, says it this way: Our somethingness is not our true essence. Oneness is our true essence. Not that it bothers all of us equally. Some people can live with it. Some people can’t…The real problem that lies at the core of addiction is that addicts are people who are in dire need of a relationship with God but are able to substitute fulfilling this need with a behavior that is essentially self-destructive.

The real problem is that a hollow sound reverberates within our souls once our awards get placed upon the shelf. Awards, applause, and notoriety only take away the loneliness very briefly.

The drugs, the alcohol, the whole bag of potato chips, illicit sex, and gambling can take the pain of loneliness away oh so briefly too. The yearning for that elusive unconditional love only grows more and more intense afterward, though. And the search gets ever more frantic, with the pain being so unbearable that it needs to be kept numbed, so that it can’t be felt anymore…at all.

Addicts are those who can’t live feeling alone, which really means, apart from God, the only source of unconditional love there actually is. Some people, it seems, can handle the separation, but those more sensitive, with their souls more exposed, and aware of the great love that is missing in their lives, cannot.

We may think that babies or pets can love us unconditionally, but that’s not real love; they are just trying to get their needs met. Physical beings can’t love unconditionally, only spiritual entities, with unlimited capabilities, truly can.

If we acknowledge the loneliness that is widespread, and then mine beneath the loneliness, we can discover that each of us is never actually alone. We are all on this amazing journey TOGETHER – with all of our souls connected and amazingly intertwined. We are all here to help each other through, revealing the full potential of each of our souls. Whenever the Oneness becomes clear, the love keeps reverberating.

Whitney Houston, a sensitive and very gifted person, felt what was missing in her life strongly, like many of us have. Being extremely talented, beautiful, powerful or wealthy can lead to extreme anxiety, however, if the source and purpose of one’s great gifts are not embraced, over and over again. Whenever we forget, and get cut off from the source of all our blessings, we experience a similar estrangement. This time, we saw it magnified to superstardom size. The pain from feeling isolated, instead of spiritually in union with the origin of all blessings, became unbearable.

The cause of all of our addictions is the suffering we experience when our souls become blocked off from the infinite whole of which they are an essential part. Abuse causes that blockage to occur, as the intrinsic value of those victimized, their godliness, becomes negated. When that connection gets obstructed, addictions are the desperate attempt to seek whatever temporary relief can be found. Relief is sought to escape the despair that results from the perceived loss of that vital bond.

Even all the awards in the world can’t make that kind of hurting end.

We thrive when we experience the deepest pleasure from the most intimate relationship possible – the one between our essence and its Source. When that relationship is viewed as severed, our gratitude dries up too, as we no longer understand from where all our gifts come.

A powerful G-d-given voice flowed through her. A stirring message can still resonate.

Bracha Goetz leads a spirituality group at Jewish Recovery Houses, coordinates a Jewish Big Brothers and Big Sisters Program in Baltimore, Maryland and is the Harvard-educated author of sixteen children’s books, including Remarkable Park , The Invisible Book and Let’s Stay Safe! You can reach Bracha Goetz at bgoetzster@gmail.com.

Why Should I Study Torah?

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I was talking to a Rav recently, who also is a high school teacher, and he felt that many frum teenagers are not connected to the Torah they are learning. They don’t really see how the sugyas in the Gemora or the Parsha is relevant to their every day life.

How would you answer the question: “Why Should I Study Torah?”

How would you answer the question: “How is the Gemorah Relevant to a Teenager?”

Teens at Risk and Baalei Teshuva Parents

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Back in October, the AJOP newsletter sent out an announcement about a study that would be presented by Dr David Pelcovitz on Teens at Risk and Baalei Teshuva. We wrote a post about it, and speculated about the results.

At the time, I was a little concerned about the study because I thought it would portray BTs in a negative light. I emailed Dr. Pelcovitz and shortly thereafter a had a conversation with him. He told me that this study and another study in Israel found that Teens from BT parents were not at greater risk of having problems than FFB parents.

As it turns out, the study was not focused on who was at greater risk BTs or FFBs, but rather what were the factors for BTs that lead to a higher chance of at-risk teens.

You can see a synopsis of the study. In addition, there is a Power Point of the presentation.

Here are the four major findings of the study:

1) Results showed parents report an adolescent of a baal teshuva family who is poorly integrated in the community will be at greater risk for behavioral difficulties.

2) Results showed that those adolescents of parents who exhibit rigid or chaotic (unhealthy) parenting style are reported by their parents as exhibiting higher levels of behavioral and emotional difficulties than adolescents whose parents exhibit an authoritative (healthy) parenting style, a balance of love and limits.

3) Results showed that adolescents of families that are either disengaged or enmeshed (unhealthy family structure) are reported by parents to exhibit higher levels of behavioral and emotional difficulties than adolescents whose families exhibit a balanced emotional connection (healthy family structure).

4) Results showed that if a parent reported becoming newly religious during his or her twenties or thirties, his or her child was reported as vulnerable for having more difficulties during adolescence.

Dr. Pelcovitz said that there were no real surprises in the study, but finding number 4 needed a little explanation.

A major take away that AJOP presented is that BTs should be provided with more parenting classes. In reality, the fact that FFBs have the same at-risk rate, means that FFBs probably should also strive to be better parents through parenting classes.

I’m glad that BTs were not found to be at greater risk as I originally feared. As a result of emailing Dr. Pelcovitz and speaking to the head of AJOP, Rabbi Lowenbraun, David and I got to present our BT observations at AJOP based on the 6 years of articles and comments from Beyond BT.

We had a decent size audience for both of our presentations and I’m not sure what the impact was. We did however speak to a number of people involved in Kiruv in preparation and we gained some more clarity on the issues facing BTs. We’ll post the summary of our presentation in the next few weeks.

Tribute to Rabbi Avraham Ginzberg, zt'”l

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by Jonathan Rosenblum
Mishpacha Magazine – February 17, 2012

Because magazines like Mishpacha work with advance deadlines my friend Rabbi Aryeh Ginzberg’s piece on Yerushalayim shel Ma’alah appeared last week, even though he was sitting shiva for his father Rabbi Avraham Ginzberg, the menahel of Yeshivas Chafetz Chaim for nearly six decades. Reb Aryeh, unfortunately, was back in Yerushalayim far sooner than he could have imagined when he wrote last week’s piece for Mishpacha, in order to accompany his father to his final resting place. I would like to share one of the stories Reb Aryeh told of his father, as he sat in Yerushalayim on Motzaei Shabbos before flying back to the United States.

Rabbi Avraham Ginzberg arrived alone in the United States before World War II, and began learning in Yeshivas Chafetz Chaim. He was virtually penniless, and worked nights in a bakery to support himself. While still single, he managed to purchase the bakery, almost entirely on credit. With the profits from the bakery, he was able to bring his whole family to the United States,after the War and the bakery provided parnassah for Reb Avraham’s father for the rest of his life.

The business acumen of the young immigrant did not escape the attention of Rabbi Alter Chanoch Henoch Leibowitz, Rosh Yeshivas Chofetz Chaim, and he asked Reb Avraham to takeover the day-to-day running of the yeshiva for a period of two years to help put the yeshiva on its feet financially. That dream of financial stability was never fully realized. The Chofetz Chaim educational network spread across America, inspired by the Rosh Yeshiva’s educational vision. Yet because a very high percentage of musmachim of Chofetz Chaim went into chinuch and few into business, the yeshiva never developed a large donor pool of affluent alumni.

As a consequence, Reb Avraham’s two years extended well over half a century. Each penny the yeshiva raised was far dearer to him than his own money. Reb Aryeh Ginzberg related how classmates once directed him to the foyer of the yeshiva building to see what his father was doing. When he arrived, only his father’s trademark worn blue straw hat, with a red feather, was visible above ground. The latter was digging down to uncover a burst pipe before the plumber arrived in order to save the yeshiva the expense of the digging. When the yeshiva honored Rabbi Ginzberg after more than half a century of service, his son told the Rosh Yeshiva not to bother purchasing any kind of gift because his father would refuse to accept anything that depleted the yeshiva’s bank account in any way.

The story that made the biggest impression on me involved an older couple who had contributed to the yeshiva at one point. Their only son had passed away, and they were alone in the world. When the husband too passed away, Rabbi Ginzberg undertook to oversee all the wife’s needs, which, unfortunately, included numerous calls in the middle of the night to rush to the hospital when she hovered on the verge of death. In her will, she left $250,000 to Rabbi Ginzberg.

The older Rabbi Ginzberg told Reb Aryeh that the money belonged to the yeshiva, as his original contact with the couple arose out of his position in the yeshiva. Reb Aryeh pointed out that the will specified Rabbi Avraham Ginzberg, not Yeshivas Chafetz Chaim. But his father would not budge.

Reb Aryeh first went to Rabbi Leibowitz, who told him that he should take the halachic shayla to the posek hador, Rabbi Moshe Feinstein. Reb Moshe ruled that the money belonged to Rabbi Ginzberg, and added that he could certainly give ma’aser to the yeshiva.

Reb Aryeh returned to his parents’ home to share Reb Moshe’s psak with his father. The senior Rabbi Ginzberg greeted the news with great joy and told his son that he had done him a great tovah. “How would someone in my financial situation ever hope to make a gift of a quarter of a million dollars to the yeshiva?” he explained. “You have made that possible.” And he proceeded to write out a check for the full $250,000 to the yeshiva, even though he was then carrying a couple of mortgages on his own home, the proceeds of which had also gone to help pay off the yeshiva’s debts.

That story characterized a whole life of thinking nothing of one’s own needs, only those of others, particularly the Yeshiva and the Rosh Yeshiva. That model deserves to be widely known, especially now that the hero of the story is no longer here to be embarrassed by its publication.

Mishpatim Summary

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Here’s Rabbi Rietti’s outline of Mishpatim. You can purchase the entire outline of the Chumash here.

Mishpatim
# 21 13 Mitzvot
# 22 19 Mitzvot
# 23 21 Mitzvot
# 24 “We shall do and then understand”

# 21 13 Mitzvot
Laws of a Jewish Servant:
* Works 6 years & is freed in the 7th
* If he was single when he began working, he leaves single
* If he was married, his wife leaves with him
* If his master gives him a gentile maidservant and she then has children, she and the children remain with the master after the Jewish Servant leaves.
* If he refuses to leave his master after six years saying he loves his master, wife & children, he is brought to court where his ear is pierced and he remains in servitude till Jubilee year.

Laws of a Jewish Maidservant:
* Destitute father sells daughter into servitude, her master must marry her, if he refuses, he must help her be redeemed by her family.
* After she was sold once, she cannot be sold ever again, neither by her father or her first master.
* If the master gives her to his son in marriage, she has all equal rights as any other Jewish wife: Food, clothing & relations
* If neither of the three above options are exercised, (redemption, marriage, or marriage to a son) she is automatically released when she reaches puberty.

Laws of Murder & Manslaughter:
* Premeditated murder is punishable by death.
* If he did not plan to kill, G-d brought it about, he runs to a city of refuge
* Hitting a parent is punishable by death.
* Kidnapping and then selling is punishable by death.
* Cursing parents is punishable be death. (sefer HaChinuch does not count cursing parents here)

Laws of Personal Injury, harming slaves:
* If one knocks another out with a stone or fist but he does not die, he must pay for his loss of work & medical bills.
* If one kills his male or female servant, he is punishable by death.
* Two men fighting accidentally hit a pregnant woman causing her to miscarry, her husband sues in court. Full monetary compensation is paid for losing an eye, tooth, hand or foot.
* If a master blinds his slave or knocks out a tooth, the slave is set free.

Laws of a Killer Ox:
* Ox kills a man or woman, ox is stoned, no benefit from it.
* If the ox killed twice after the owner was warned & now it killed a third time, the ox is stoned & the owner is liable to death by the hands of heaven.
* The owner pays a monetary penalty fixed by the courts as an atonement
* If the ox kills a child, boy or girl, the ox is stoned
* If the ox kills a male or female slave, ox is stoned & its owner pays 30 shekel of silver to the master of the victim.

Laws of a Pit:
* One digs a pit or uncovers it, an ox or donkey falls in, the one who made the pit pays full cost of damage, dead animal belongs to its owner.

Laws of a Damaging Ox:
* An ox gores another ox, later it dies from the injury, the live ox is sold & the money is divided, they also divide the money from the dead animal.
* If the goring ox gored before and the owner did not protect it after being warned, then the owner pays the full value of the dead ox.

Laws of Stealing:
* One steals an ox or sheep, slaughters it and sells it, pays 5 oxen for the ox and 4 sheep for the sheep.

# 22 19 Mitzvot
Laws of Stealing continued
* A burgler is hit and killed while in the act of breaking into a house, this is
not murder.
* If he was killed in daylight (it is clear he did not intend to kill) it is murder
* A thief pays in full for what he stole. If he does not have the money, he is
sold as a servant.
* If the stolen item is found in his possession, whether an ox, donkey or
sheep, the thief has to pay double its price.

Damage caused by your animal grazing:
* If an animal grazes on private property, the owner of the animal must pay
from the best of his field & vineyard.

Damage by Fire:
* A fire gets out of control and burns crops, the one who began the fire pays in full.

The Unpaid Guard:
* Items placed with an unpaid guard and stolen, the guard swears he did not touch the missing item.
* All claims of liability, negligence or denied guilt, where one side says it was stolen and the other claims it was lost, both parties come to Bet Din for litigation. The party found guilty by witnesses pays double
(This law is one of the 7 Mitzvot instructed to all mankind: )

The Paid Guard:
* A paid guard swears he did not make use of the item that was killed, maimed or raided without witnesses, the owner must accept the oath and the paid guard is not penalized.
* If the guarded item was stolen, then the guard must pay the owner.
* If the guarded animal was killed by a wild beast and the guard can prove it, he does not pay for the attacked animal.

Borrowing & Rentals:
* If a borrowed item is broken or stolen, & the owner was not around at the time, the borrower pays in full.
* If the owner was there at the time the item was broken or stolen, then the borrower is exempt.
* If one hires an item that is then lost or stolen, the loss is covered by the rental price. (a renter has same status as a paid guard, so he is responsible for losses unless it was beyond his control). (HaChinuch does not count Sachir here)

Laws of Seduction:
* If a man seduces an unbetrothed virgin, he must pay a dowry & marry her.
* If she or her father refuses to marry her to him, he must pay the father 50 Silver Shekel.
* Don’t allow a witch to live.
* One who sleeps with an animal is punishable by death.
* Bringing offerings to other gods other than HaShem is punishable by death.

Laws of Oppression:
* Don’t hurt the feelings of a Ger, righteous convert.
* Don’t oppress a Ger in monetary matters.
* Don’t hurt the feelings of a widow or orphan.
* If you mistreat a widow or orphan & they cry to me, My anger will be focused on you till your wives will be widows and your children orphans.

Laws of Lending:
* Lend money to the poor.
* Don’t pressure him to repay you if he does not have the money.
* Don’t charge or participate in charging interest.
* If you take his garment as security against the loan, return it to him before sunset, it might be his only covering he sleeps in. *
* Don’t curse judges.
* Don’t curse a leader / King.
* Don’t give agricultural taxes out of sequence.

Laws of First born:
* Give Me your first born sons, oxen, sheep.
* Every first born animal remains with its mother for 7 days
* On its eighth day, you shall dedicate the first born animal to Me.
* Don’t eat flesh torn from a living animal, give it to the dog.

# 23 21 Mitzvot
Laws of Justice:
* Don’t believe Lashon Hara, derogatory speech.
* Don’t accept testimony if the opposing party is not present.*
* Don’t join a wicked person to be a witness with him.
* Don’t accept a wicked person’s testimony.
* Don’t follow a majority of one to impose the death penalty.
* Don’t switch from a favorable verdict to one of guilty.
* All cases are decided on a majority opinion.
* Don’t favor a poor person in court because he is poor.
* If you see your enemy’s ox or donkey astray, return him.
* If you see the donkey of someone you hate collapsing under its load, & you would rather refrain from assisting, you must help unload it.
* When a wicked person appears in court, judge the case on its merits, don’t pervert justice because he is wicked.
* Keep yourself distant from anything false.*
* Do not kill one who is not proven guilty or one who has already been acquitted. I will not let anyone guilty escape punishment.
* Don’t accept a bribe to pervert justice.
* A Judge must not oppress a Ger, foreigner / convert. * sefer HaChinuch does not count this here
* Every seventh year, leave your produce alone.
* Stop working on Shabbos.
* Don’t say the name of Avoda Zara or swear in its name.*
* Don’t try to persuade others to follow other gods.
* Celebrate three festivals each year with Korban Chagiga.
* Observe the Passover festival
* Don’t slaughter the Pascal Lamb while you still own Chametz.
* Don’t leave over till the morning any fat of the Korban Pesach meant for burning on the altar.
* Bring your first-fruits to the Temple.
* Don’t eat Milk and Meat together.
* Sefer HaChinuch does not count not saying names of Avoda Zara here

Warning of obedience:
* I Am sending an angel to guide you, listen to him & don’t disobey him.
* Destroy the idols in the land you occupy
* Only serve Me!, then I will bless your bread & water & banish sickness from you. (sefer HaChinuch does not count Tefila here)
* I will send a deadly hornet to drive out your enemies from the land.
* I will drive them out gradually
* Don’t make any treaty with the seven nations.
* Don’t let them settle in your land.

# 24 “We shall do and then understand”
* G-d tells Moshe to ascend Mt. Sinai with Aron, Arons’ sons & 70 elders.
* Only Moshe ascended to the top.
* Moshe descended and shared all G-ds’ instructions, we answered in one voice, we will do everything HaShem spoke.
* Moshe wrote everything.
* Moshe awoke early and built an altar at bottom of Mt. Sinai & 12 pillars.
* Moshe sent first born lads to offer offerings.
* Moshe put half the blood in basins, the other half he sprinkled on the Altar.
* Moshe read out loud the Sefer HaBrit and they replied: “We shall do & then understand.”
* The blood in the basins, Moshe now sprinkled on the people.
* “With this blood you have entered a contract with all these words of G-d.
* Moshe, Aron & sons with 70 elders ascend the mountain.
* They had a vision of HaShem nourishing them like food.
* G-d tells Moshe to ascend & receive the Tablets, The Torah & the Mitzva.
* Moshe on Mt. Sinai 40 days and 40 nights